Speechless

God is good all the time! All the time, God is good!

Have you ever had one of those weeks? You know what I'm talking about. The weeks where it seems like nothing is going your way. You are bogged down with homework and papers and exams and responsibilities. You just want to lay down in your bed and sleep. You wish that you could have a full week off so that you can rest and get your life together. Yeah...I had one of those weeks.

It wasn't a full week either. Just three days of school. We just had our fall break at school and I went home for a few days to relax and get away from school. It was wonderful. Then I came back to Berry and everything hit me all at once on Tuesday night. I had so much work to do this week. Three days of classes and I had SO MUCH TO DO.

I was stressed and broken down to say the least. My soul was weak.

I tried to end my week on a good note. Fall has finally arrived and my friends and I were going to get cupcakes and then go to a pumpkin patch to get pumpkins to decorate. We did so and I had a great time. I laughed and joked and was able to spend precious time with two of my closest friends in the world.

But I still felt empty inside.

We went back to school, baked sugar cookies and painted pumpkins. We watched Halloween movies and talked about life. I will treasure those memories for the rest of my life.

My soul still wasn't full.

The next day (Saturday), I slept in, watched horror movies and worked on some new short stories. I was relaxed and was glad to have time to myself. I needed it. That night, I went with my friends to Berry's Fall Festival. There was food, music and games. We enjoyed every bit of it. We walked around the campus last night and just breathed in warm fall air.

Yet, I didn't feel fulfilled like I should.

Last night, I was out in my hall when I ran into my RA, Whitney. She and I had plans today to get coffee and talk. However, last night she asked me if I wanted to do lunch instead. Then asked if I would like to go to church with her. I agreed as I hadn't been to an off campus church all semester and felt like I needed to go.

So this morning, I woke up, got dressed and went with her to West Rome Baptist. And let me tell you, God is so so good. Gracious, He is good!

Today's sermon wasn't all that life changing. It was a simple sermon about the book of John in the Bible. However, the worship, oh, sweet joy, the worship is what broke me down.

You see, God is working in our lives all the time. No matter what is going on in our lives, God is there for us. He loves us unconditionally. He fills our very souls and hearts with His undying love.

These past few days, I just wasn't feeling it. I wanted things to be going my way and under my circumstances. Only, I forgot that this isn't my will for life. It has never been my will. It has always been God's.

God spoke to me this morning. Through worship and through the soul of my beautiful friend, Whitney. He continued to show me to let His will be done. Not my own. I came back to my room, speechless from the glory of God.

Guys, find yourself that friend who will build you up. The friend who encourages you in your walk with God. The friend who wants to sit and talk with you about missions in different countries, about Jesus and about life in general. I found one of those friends this year, and let me tell you, she has changed my life for the better.

There are times when I feel like I can't do it anymore. Times when Satan wants to draw me back to the dark abyss from my past. But I know that Jesus has a hold on me. He blesses me daily with wonderful friends and an encouraging family. I wouldn't want it any other way.

Death was arrested and my new life began.

In His Name.

Happy

Hey guys! With Easter right around the corner (TOMORROW!!), I wanted to write a quick blog post about something I've been focusing on quite recently in my life.

As humans living in this world, we tend to get caught up in the negatives of our lives. We dwell on them and let them drown out everything else in our lives. Personally, my last few weeks have been filled with getting over a harsh break-up, stressing over tests and school work, wondering about the future (aka--senior year at college) and much much more. I was letting these events in my life overtake the happy things.

This past week, however, I took time to write out the things that make me happy. It's so easy to pick out things that make me unhappy, but until we truly think hard about it, those things overwhelm us. Trust me, there are a lot more things in life to be happy and to laugh about. So many more than we actually realize! Like I've said before, it's the little things in life that make us most happy.

So, here is a list of 50 things that make me happy. (What are yours?)

1. A warm cup of coffee in the morning
2. Freshly dried laundry
3. A warm, sunshiny day
4. The first blooms of Spring
5. Laughing to the point that your abs ache
6. Bible journaling
7. A long talk with an old friend
8. The smell of coffee shops (I love coffee--sue me)
9. The smell of an old book
10. Dates with my siblings
11. Baking cookies in the middle of the night
12. Sales at clothing stores
13. Shopping at thrift stores
14. Pancakes
15. Hammocking in a park
16. Running around with bare feet
17. Freshly mowed grass
18. Thunderstorms
19. Afternoon naps
20. Having butterflies in my stomach
21. Long, hot showers
22. Reading my Bible
23. Going to church on Sunday mornings
24. Cooking
25. And baking!
26. Sunrises
27. Sunsets
28. Driving with the top down in my car
29. Singing along to the radio
30. Dance parties
31. Looking at old photographs
32. Waking up in the middle of the night and realizing you can go back to sleep
33. Finding a verse that fits perfectly with your current situation
34. Worship music
35. Random acts of kindness
36. Surviving another school year
37. Heart to hearts with parents/grandparents
38. Long hugs
39. Forehead kisses
40. Realizing how blessed this life is
41. Knowing that God has a hold on me
42. Dressing up and going out
43. Feeling pretty
44. Wearing lipstick
45. The mornings that you can lay in the bed for hours
46. Finishing a good book
47. Netflix marathons
48. Working out
49. Feeling confident
50. Painting

So yeah, those are my top 50. I could write so many more. But, I'll spare you from reading all of that. Basically, whatever you are going through...whether it be a bad break-up (which is my case), an awful school year/semester, etc...take the time to write out what makes you happy. And by the time you get into it, you'll find yourself smiling more and more. 

Don't be afraid to be happy again if you're going through a rough patch. God wants us to be happy and wants us to realize that He has better things in store for us. All it takes is time. 

I like to go back to this verse whenever I'm struggling. I hope it encourages you as well:

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance." (James 1:2-3)

In His name. 

Healing

Wow. It's pretty early, huh? Or pretty late, depending on which way you look at things. Haha. I woke up a few hours ago and just couldn't go back to sleep. So, instead, I picked up my Bible and began to read, hoping that I would be able to get tired enough to fall back asleep.

While reading I came across this verse: "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my  righteous right hand." (Isaiah 41:10)

The past few weeks have honestly been quite hellish for me. On March 1st, I was admitted into the hospital for DKA (diabetic ketoacidosis). This basically means I wasn't taking care of my Type 1 Diabetes like I should've been doing and my blood sugars got too high and wouldn't come back down. I spent the rest of the week in the hospital trying to get better.

I then came home for my spring break to hopefully relax and get my health back in shape before the rest of the semester. However, little did I know that another blow would be waiting for me. Just yesterday morning, my boyfriend of six months called me over to his place and broke up with me. I won't go into details, but obviously, it hurt. A lot. I spent the rest of the day crying in bed and unwilling to motivate myself to do anything, really. So I assume that's why I couldn't really sleep tonight. With all of this on my mind, it makes it hard to relax enough to want to sleep.

It was right after I read that verse above that I felt God with me. I felt His presence near me as I cried while reading that verse over and over again. He placed His hand on my shoulder and whispered:

"Kaitlyn, my beautiful daughter, do not worry. Do not fear. I am with you every step of the way. I will not let you fall. Trust in me. Lean on me. Cast all your burdens on me and I will make you whole again. Do not worry or stress about what is to come. It is all in My hands. Let My will be done. I will never forsake you."

Those words He spoke over me soothed my soul. I know that healing my heart will take time. But I also know that I have a God on my side that will always be there for me no matter what.

So, I decided that I am going to take five specific steps in my life to make myself whole again.

1. I'm going to start living a healthier lifestyle.

There is no need for me to allow myself to wallow in self-pity or guilt and eat all the junk food I can manage. While I may indulge once or twice, I've decided to start working on becoming a healthier me. So, I'm going to start eating right and exercising more often. I honestly want to start running again and start training for 5ks, 10ks, and maybe even a half-marathon. This way, too, my diabetes will be better managed and I won't be feeling so run down anymore.

2. I'm going to spend time with friends.

I haven't done that much this semester (or even last semester) and I feel awful about that. I believe that healing myself will come more easily if I am surrounded by those whom I love and who love me back. So, I'm going to start going out with friends more, taking more adventures with them and just kicking back and having fun.

3. I'm going to dig into the Word.

This one is important. I feel that my spiritual health has also been declining recently and I am so ashamed of that. So, I'm going to start reading my Bible daily and start praying endlessly to God. He needs to become number one in my life again and I'm going to make sure that happens as soon as possible.

4. I'm going to forgive.

This one is also very important. I'm the type of person who can and will hold a grudge for a very long time. I need to learn how to undo that and control my feelings better. So, I'm going to start by forgiving myself. I can't blame myself for everything that has happened. It's not fair to me. And it just drags me down even more than I already am dragged down by current situations. I'm also going to forgive those who may have hurt me. There's no need for me to be angry at all these people all the time. It's not healthy. And if I do continue to be angry and hold a grudge, I won't be able to properly move on with my life.

5. I'm going to love myself.

We all have issues of self-worth. When my boyfriend broke up with me, all I could think was "I'm obviously not good enough. What's wrong with me? What happened? He deserves better than me." et cetera, et cetera. I was beating myself down. I told myself that I wasn't worthy of his (or anybody's) attention. That I didn't deserve to love and be loved in return. When, in reality, that is so not true. I deserve all of that and more. So, on this road to healing, I'm going to love myself. I'm going to work on boosting my self-confidence so that I can proclaim every minute of every hour of every day that "I am worth loving."

It's time for me to take a step back and start healing. And it may be time for some of you to do that as well. All I can say is: Kudos to you for taking that step. I know (I swear I do) that making that decision was a hard one. Sometimes, all we want to do is be upset and hurt and angry. But if we allow ourselves to do that, we will never move forward in life and will continue to hurt others along the way.

Be on the lookout for another post in the upcoming weeks about my progress to healing. These past few weeks were a wake up call for me. I'm ready to take on life and to make myself whole again, with friends, family, and most importantly, God, by my side every step of the way.

Free

Take a look at me.

I'm 20 years young, a junior in college, a photographer, a painter, a writer, et cetera, et cetera.

Now...really take a look at me....

Scars line my body. From the top of my head to the very tips of my toes, I have a spattering of scars. They are all over my arms, my chest, my waist, my legs....

Since I was in middle school, I have suffered from a disorder called dermatillomania (or, better known as chronic skin picking).

This disorder has disrupted my life in many ways.

It started as my head peeling from a recent sunburn. I started to pick at it, forming scabs that, fortunately, were hidden by my thick hair.

This led to me developing a staph infection throughout my body. The staph soon went away (after some antibiotics) but my skin picking didn't stop. Basically, I was picking at acne, dry skin, fingernails, you name it.

For years and years I attempted to stop. Trust me. I tried everything. I tried ointments to get rid of scabs; I took antibiotics; I used face wash after face wash to get rid of acne. However, because this is an OCD disorder, medicine for the scabs and acne and everything else didn't and wouldn't ever fix anything. In order to heal, I should've worked to control my stress, anxiety, and negative emotions. (I did not know this at the time.

Over the years, it just became something that I did to cope. Even when I wasn't upset, I would start picking at whatever was on my body. I did it absentmindedly. It even got to the point where I was highly embarrassed of the scarring that was on my body. I couldn't control it.

The fact that I have an obsessive compulsive disorder that I have absolutely no control over is ironic but hardly poetic.

This disorder wrecked my emotionally and physically. I now have scars all over my body. I may not be self-conscious about them anymore, but they will always be a part of me. Emotionally, it took a lot to accept this as what was happening to me. I didn't want to admit to it. I just chose to ignore it. No matter the number of scars or the amount of comments I got, I just ignored it.

But, the reason I wanted to talk to you guys about this is because I wanted to officially share the big news I received about two weeks ago.

For the first time in about 8 years, I do not have an open wound on my body. I have not picked at anything on my body in almost 3 weeks. I'm on the road to healing.

I am FREE of this burden.

Now, I know this could come back, but I've also learned how to better control my stress and my emotions. I've worked hard to get to where I am now and I'm going to continue to work hard to keep this up.

I'm spending more time in my bible and even bought a new journalling bible to be able to keep track of my thoughts. God has really shown me a lot these past few weeks and this past summer as well.

I am free. I am free. I. Am. FREE. 

In His love.

Bittersweet

So, it's finally here. My last day as a sophomore at Berry College. As I sit here writing this, so many memories are flooding my brain and I can't stop the tears from running down my face. This year has had its ups and downs, but it has been a year to remember. So, I thought I would share a list of things I learned this year. (Upcoming sophomores, this is really for you as you take the next step in your college career. Though, some of it can apply to upcoming freshman, too.) So, here we go:

13 things I learned during my sophomore year:

1. Whenever you're up studying past midnight, Cookout milkshakes and fries are always there for you. 

This is the one universal truth. Too many nights have I ended up studying past midnight and became hungry. Cookout is open till 3-4am EVERY NIGHT. As well as being super cheap. So, if you're craving a milkshake, a hamburger or a corndog at 2 am in the morning, Cookout is there and will never leave you. 

2. No matter how many times you tell yourself the situation won't be awkward, it'll always be awkward.

Let's just be honest with ourselves. You can say over and over again how that specific situation won't be awkward and that you refuse to make it awkward. The thing is, that it will always be awkward. No matter how hard you try. So, you might as well just agree that it will get awkward and get over it. No use in trying to make something work that won't work in the first place.

3. People will hurt you, but it's better in the long run to forgive them and move on. 

This is something I struggled with a lot this year. I had a lot of people leave my life and a lot betray me. I'm the type of person to act like I'm okay on the outside, but will be holding a grudge inside. This isn't good for anybody involved. So, it's easiest to forgive the people who hurt you and just move on. And whether that means getting over them and losing their friendship or it means that your friendship continues no matter what, we have to learn to deal with it when it happens and not fret over it for days on end. 

4. Sometimes you have to put yourself out there to meet new people. 

Those of you who know me know that I'm quite the introverted person. I don't like huge crowds and have trouble speaking to brand new people. But, I found out this year, that I just have to make that first big leap and everything else will fall into place. I made a bunch of new friends this year just by opening up and introducing myself. It's really not that hard to do, but it may seem like it. So, take that step and meet new friends. 

5. Life will knock you down, but it's up to you to stand right back up and keep on going. 

Oh, boy will it. Life likes to take what seem like the best days of your life and flipping them upside down so that in knocks you flat on your back. And the only thing I can tell you to do is to stand back up immediately and keep going. Don't let that one awful night, grade or fight consume you. Hold your head up, darling. You've got this!



6. Stargazing is a way to relieve stress and think about life and all it has to offer. 

The amount of nights I've spent outside watching the stars are too many to count. Whenever I've found myself stressing over school, boys, family, friends, etc. I've packed up my blankets and a cup of coffee and went to lay out underneath the heavens. Stargazing is a wonderful way to relax and to remember that God is bigger than everything going on in your life. He put every star in that sky and yet he calls you by name and says that you are beautiful. 

7. While it's fun to go out with friends for the night, sometimes it's just best to stay in, eat 
Ramen noodles and study for your classes. 

(THIS IS IMPORTANT FOR FRESHMAN TOO.) I understand that you really really want to go see that new rom-com that came out this weekend, but didn't your professor say that you have a huge test on Monday that counts for 20% of your grade? It's all about priorities. Yes, go out and have fun. That's part of college. The friends you make here will most likely be your friends for life, so you will want to hang out with them. But grades are also important if not much more important than your social life. So, go out and have fun, but make sure you also have enough time to study as much as you need to for any exams, quizzes or homework.

8. Boy drama never ends after high school, but you do learn how to handle it with more maturity. 

He said; she said....It's all the same as it was in high school. The only difference between then and now is that you understand how to deal with it with more maturity. Let's face it...you are almost 20 years old. You are old enough not to start rumors or throw a hissy fit because a boy did something to you.
9. You don't always keep the friends you made freshman year. And that's okay. You'll make new ones. 

This one was hard to come to terms with. I had a lot of great friends that I made during my freshman year. Then came sophomore year and about 50% of those friendships were lost or didn't continue because of certain reasons. And it's hard to keep up with everybody. It is. But, I also made a ton of new friends this year; friends that I wouldn't trade for the world. And I'm okay that I lost some friendships. Obviously, God didn't plan for us to stay friends. He had different plans for each of us and neither involved the other. So, don't worry if you can't keep in contact with friends from freshman year. You'll make new friends and it won't end up being a big deal in the long run.

10. The "Sophomore Slump" is real and very dangerous. 

All I can say here is to be careful and keep up the good work you did during freshman year. 

11. Take as many adventures as you can.

(...while still focusing on keeping your grades up.) Take a Saturday off and go hike or hammock with friends. Try a new local restaurant in town. Go out for frozen yogurt or ice cream. Take a day trip to a city that's close by. Spend the day in Goodwill and find yourself a new wardrobe. The possibilities are endless. But while you're working on getting through your sophomore year alive, don't forget to have      fun every once in a while. 

12. True friends are those who will sit out on the front porch with you for hours and are willing to talk about life and its problems.

This. I don't have the words to explain how much some people have blessed me this year by being there for me. I can always count on these friends to drop anything and everything to come to my side if I need them. Throughout the year, you will find these friends and my advice to you is to hold on to them and never let them go. 

13. No matter how crazy life seems, there is always our God to look up to and thank for giving us another day.

Is there anymore to say about this one??


So there they are. My thirteen things that I learned throughout this past year. I'm so blessed to live the life I do and I cannot wait to see what the next two years at Berry have in store for me. Thanks to all who have made this year so very wonderful and I can't wait to see you guys in the fall!

In His love,

Burdened

Well...it's finally here. The end of my sophomore year. My college career is half over.

It honestly doesn't feel real to me. I feel like I should still be coloring pictures for homework and drink out of tiny juice boxes.

I have one more week of final exams and then I get to return home for the summer. I cannot wait to be back in a nice, soft bed with a home-cooked meal and actual water pressure in my shower. I will get to return to my old job as well as getting to return to my friends in Auburn.

Like I said, I cannot wait.

So, why is it that I'm sitting here underneath the stars, sobbing uncontrollably because I have to leave in a week? 

The past few weeks have been a whirlwind of emotions for me. I've been struggling a lot with some things in my life and it wasn't until recently that I've realized that I let them slowly control my life and everything in it.

I've let these things consume me until it was all I thought and worried and stressed over.

Boys.

School.

Friends.

Family.

Money.

Jobs.

Those are just a few of the many things that have been swirling around in my head recently. Notice how I didn't mention God or my Bible or my faith. Yeah, I've been failing at that recently. I haven't been giving Him the time He needs from me on a day to day basis.

Instead, I've allowed drama to seep into my life and start to take over. Boy drama, friend drama, family drama; it's all there. And I am so, so ashamed of that.

I told myself that I wanted this semester to be drama free and that I would take a step back from everything and anything to do with drama. I guess that was a stupid promise to make on my part, because naturally, drama finds me (or I find it).

I guess part of it is because I don't have the courage to tell people how I really feel. I let it sit in me until eventually I burst and it al comes out in one heap. (And that is sooo not the way to tell people how you feel about them.)

I hate confrontation, so anything that has to do with me owning up to stuff in front of people is a no-no. This is why I told the guy I was crushing on that I liked him via text message. And why I refused to look my friend in the eye when I told her how upset I was with her for dumping me for other, "cooler" people. And also why I struggled with telling my mom how left out I felt in the family now that I don't live at home anymore and was missing everything that went on.

Today, I felt overwhelmed. So, naturally, I went on a midnight drive to do some stargazing and some deep thinking.

And here we are. With me still sobbing and you most likely thinking I'm a crazy person. (I'm not. I promise. I'm just emotional.)

Crying has helped relieve some stress from finals and everything. It has also helped me finally and clearly see the problems that have been in my life recently. Just a little while ago as I began to type this up, one of my favorite songs (Love Ran Red--Chris Tomlin) came on the radio and I just had to turn it all the way up and belt the song from the top of my lungs.

And when the song ended, I heard God speak to me. I closed my eyes and listened to Him whisper in my ear:

"Kaitlyn, my beautiful daughter, lean on Me. I am here for you. I will never forsake you. Let go of all these burdens and give them to Me. I will take them from you and put them on my back. Let Me carry these for you. Just hand them to Me.

"Remember, my love, that you are a beautiful creation of Mine. I wove you together from dust. You are perfectly imperfect in every single way and that is why I love you so. You are My daughter--My wonderful, beautiful, magnificent daughter--My Princess.

"My plan for you is so great. Don't ever forget that. I know you may want to lead your own life and I understand, but, my darling, let My will be done. I love you."

My God is so amazing. After tonight, I feel that I can make it through anything. With Him by my side every step of the way I know I can do anything I put my mind to. I'm thankful and so very blessed for a God such as this.

In His love.

Redeemed

"Yet, O Lord, You are our Father. We are the clay, You are the potter; we are all the work of Your hand." (Isaiah 64:8)

We are a broken people.

We live in a broken world.

As humans, we all are broken and shattered and no where near perfect.

But see, that's not the end of our lives.

Our lives are not our own stories. It is not---it was never--about us and us alone. This life, this wonderful, glorious life that we live is all about Him and about us coming to be a part of His story. 

The verse that I started this post off with is a verse that has been on my mind for a few weeks now. If you go to church on a regular basis or have been a Christian for a few years or more, I'm sure you've heard this verse a lot. A verse that likens us to clay and God to the potter. 

God took us from an image in His mind and he created us. He formed us all uniquely and all for Him. We were created to serve Him and all He does for us. 

I just love the idea of us being clay in His hands. Before He touches us, we are formless. We are void of life, of soul. The moment that He begins His work in us, we become full of life, of love. We are beautiful creations--works--of His own hand. 

But, the thing about clay is that it is continually worked and reshaped to the potter's likings. The potter does not rest until he is satisfied with his work. This also means that the clay must be willing to be reformed into something new.

As the clay of His hands, we, as God's sons and daughters must be yielded and still. We have to allow God to shape us with his hands. There are three things that I see that we must be able to do and go through in order for God to shape us:

1. Patience--In order for God to be able to mold us into people He would like for us to be, we must have patience. We cannot and must not be impatient as that does not do anything for us. Impatience causes stress and unhappiness. Patience, on the other hand, fills us with life and with happiness.

2. We must be willing to be destroyed. Sometimes, the potter needs to start all over again. To do so, the old pottery must be destroyed so that a new one can take its place. It's hard to be willing to be destroyed. We love our lives and sometimes we don't want to change. Change is hard. But God promises to bring joy with the change. When old doors close, new ones open and that's what we know to be true. God's promises never break.

3. Allow God to treat us with tenderness. Just as clay is slowly and tenderly formed into a pot, God places His hands softly on us to form us. He is never rough nor does he rip and tear at us. His love washes over us and He holds us carefully in His arms. 

We need to stop taking our heart out of His hands. He knows what is best for us and we need to let Him hold our hearts. That's what I mean when I say that we must be yielded and still. We need to let Him form us. 

There's an old saying that goes: "My life in Your hands; my ways for Your plans".

One more thing I wanted to mention about this is that when you look at a potter, what do you see? What are they covered in?

Clay.

They are covered from head to toe in the clay that they have been working with.

This is another image that I'm in love with. God, our potter, is covered in clay. He is covered in us. So that we may be covered and clothed in righteousness. God became flesh and put on our clay and was hung on that cross. 

He wore it so we didn't have to. He became dirty and muddy and downright filthy so that we can become beautiful and priceless in His image. 

How amazing is that?

As I leave this with you guys today, I just want say, surrender yourselves to the Potter. Because through Him, we are redeemed. 

In His love.

Chaser

Let me officially say, welcome to a new year.

I know that it has been a while since I posted last and I would vehemently apologize for it, but the thing is, I enjoyed some time off from this blog. I got to spend it with family and friends and was able to enjoy myself for a month or two.

But, I am back now, and I cannot wait to start posting more!

So, what better way to start off this new year then by talking about what it means to move forward in life rather than being stuck in a moment.

Let's talk about what it means to be "chasing daylight".

This morning, I woke up super early (like 6 am early...and it's a holiday!!) so I could sit outside on my porch and watch the sunrise. I grabbed my cup of coffee, my bible and my journal and settled in for a good, long talk with my Creator. Little did I know, that my life and goals were about to change for the better.

One of my New Years resolutions was to (once again) read the bible from start to finish. I've done it once before about 4-5 years ago and thought why not do it again, now that I have a better understand of who God is in my life.

So I started off in the book of Deuteronomy, in chapter 30. (This is where I had left off the other night while reading.) I got to a particular passage in this chapter and let me just say, I was blown away. Here is the passage:

"See, I set before you today life and prosperity, death and destruction. For I command you today to love the Lord your God, to walk in His ways, and to keep His commands, decrees and laws; then you will live and increase, and the Lord your God will bless you in the land you are entering to possess. 

"But if your heart turns away and you are not obedient, and if you are drawn away to bow down to other gods and worship them, I declare to you this day that you will certainly be destroyed. You will not live long....

"...Now choose life, so that you and your children may live...For the Lord is your life..." (Deuteronomy 30: 15-20)

In this passage, God is pointing to two different paths. One will be a journey that parts ways from Him and the other leads to a journey in which He will part the way. One points to death, the other points to life.

There are three words I would like to focus on, though. Three words that are passed on from God to us, His people: "Now choose life".

Those words are life-changing to me. God isn't just telling me to live a life focused on Him and His word. He is telling me:

"Kaitlyn, you were born to live a great adventure; you were created with a divine destiny; You are called to fulfill a great mission. You were designed, by Me, for a unique purpose. Now, you are called to live it out."

In those words from before, God is telling us that right now, in this moment, put away the baggage from the past, shake ourselves free from the fear of the future unknown. Right now, choose life--seize divine moments.

To relive the past is to relinquish the future. If you are willing to let go of the past, then you are ready to step into the future. When you choose to remain stuck in a moment, you become incapable of seizing divine moments.

This morning, during my quiet time with God, I found that I want to stop living in the past. I want to stop reliving moments over and over again, wondering what I could have done differently to avoid some regretful actions and decisions. I want to move forward. I want to dare to look into the future. And if the future scares me, then I'll just take it one moment at a time. 

We were designed to move forwards in time, never to move backwards, nor to stay stuck in a moment. We were designed to chase the daylight--to chase our futures and to chase our dreams. 

I want to be a chaser.

So, here's a question for you:

In your moment of truth, what will you choose? Will you choose the wilderness or the adventure? Have you confused the blessing of God with wealth, comfort, and security? Have you considered that God's greatest gift to you is that He calls you to be a pioneer, explorer, and even creator?

There are things God does for you and things that God waits for you to do. The journey begins when you choose. Stop wasting daylight. Choose a life of meaningful adventure. When you do, you will live in the epicenter of God's activity.

In His love.

Thankful

So, it's my first Friday night back at school and I'm sitting in my room by myself. Down the road, there's a back-to-school dance going on; there's a huge volleyball match right outside my window; people were baking cookies earlier in the kitchen. There's a lot of stuff going on tonight, but I decided to stay in. Part of the reason is because I have an awful headache and a fever, so I don't feel so well. And the other part is because I wanted to spend time in the Word. I haven't done that a lot recently, and I felt like tonight was a perfect night to do so.

So here I am. With my mug full of hot tea, my Bible opened, my praise music on, and my new devotional already covered in my handwriting.

I started my time with my Father by opening my journal and working on my Thankful List.

Now, many of you may be wondering what a Thankful List is and I'm happy to explain.

About a year ago, one of my very best friends told me about this list she had been keeping where she wrote down everything she is thankful for. Obviously, I was intrigued. She told me that whenever something that she took for granted or just was happy about, she would write it on the list. The challenge was to find 1000 things to be thankful for. Yes, you can repeat things. (You're allowed to be thankful for something more than once in your life.)

So, the next day, I found a journal that I was going to discard because I honestly didn't want to look at it anymore. (Note: I'm about to go into a side-tracked story for you to understand why I wanted to get rid of the journal.) 

On the front of it was the logo for Winshape, the Christian program at my school. You have to apply to be in this program and I did so. I even got as far as the interview process. I got to spend two days at this wonderful place where college students spent their days with each other praising God and having fun. 

To put it plainly, I fell in love with Winshape and the people there. I wanted to be a part of it. I wanted it like nothing I've ever wanted before.

After the interview process, they told us that we would be contacted in a few months for whether we got in or not. I anxiously waited for that letter. I checked the mail obsessively for weeks. I got a care package from them which contained a sticker for my car and this journal, among other little things. I was so optimistic that I went ahead and put the sticker on my car's back windshield.

Then the letter came. It was too thin. I knew without even opening it that I hadn't made it. I could barely even open it because I was shaking so badly. Once I finally opened it and read those heartbreaking few sentences, I broke down. I cried and cried and cried. I felt betrayed by God. I thought He had wanted me there. I thought that He pushed me that far because He wanted me to be a part of Winshape. 

That rejection hurt. A lot. I didn't want to look at anything to do with Winshape for a few weeks. It hurt to tell those friends I made while at the interview process that I didn't make it. I couldn't talk to any of them without breaking down and crying.

I threw away the letters from Winshape, and most of the stuff they had sent me save for a devotional, that car sticker and the journal.

It wasn't until that day that I found the journal, that I realized how thankful I was for the opportunity to interview with Winshape. Not many people get that far and I did. Obviously, God didn't want me there at that time, and I realized last year, that Winshape wasn't meant for me at all. God has bigger and better plans for me and my life, so I put my trust in Him that He knows what they are.

But anyway, after realizing that, I opened this journal and started my 1000 Things to be Thankful For list. And let me say, it's something that I treasure. I will admit that it's hard sometimes. It's been a year and I'm only halfway through the list. Somedays, I feel like I don't have something to be thankful for. But I try to write at least one thing per day no matter what.

And the cool thing is that this list can include everything from serious things to downright silly things. For example (as you can see from my pictures), I wrote down things from Subway to life in general, from my roommate to One Direction, from my faith to bubble baths. We have so so much to give thanks to.

I wrote about 15 things tonight and I'll probably write more after this post. But, my devotional tonight actually dealt with being thankful. I read so many verses about thankfulness and I am so happy that I live in a world under a God who has given me so much to be thankful for.

Take a look at these 20 verses on thankfulness:

1 Thessalonians 5:18

Psalm 107:1

Ephesians 5:20

Colossians 3:15-17

James 1:17

Philippians 4:6

2 Corinthians 9:15

Psalm 106:1

Psalm 105:1

Colossians 4:2

Psalm 118:1-18

Psalm 20:4

Psalm 30:12

Colossians 3:17

Romans 1:21

Psalm 100:4

Isaiah 12:4-5

1 Chronicles 29:13

Philemon 1:4

That is twenty (TWENTY) verse about being thankful. And I'm sure there are many many more. The ability to be thankful and to express thanks to our Lord is pretty cool and I want to be able to remember to do it every day. I want to wake up each morning and tell God thanks for just giving me another day to live. I want to go to bed every night and tell Him thanks for everything that happened that day. And I plan on doing both those things everyday now.

Trust me, every one of you reading this is on my Thankful List. I love you guys immensely and I thank you for letting me vent or just express my feelings or thoughts towards you guys. Y'all really are great.

Be thankful for what and who you have in your life. Don't take anything for granted. And live a full life.

In His love,

Kaitlyn

Broken and Healed

Hey friends.

I know that it's been a while since I've posted and I apologize. I've been busy. It is summer, after all. (That's not really an excuse, but I'm going to use it anyways.)

Before I get into what I want to talk about today, I wanted to update you guys with what's going on in my life. First things first, I got a promotion at work so you are now looking at a new assistant manager (WOOO!). I also got to move out of my parents' home into another house because we had friends from my church need a house sitter for two months. It's been great. I'm living with a good friend of mine and it's honestly been nice to not live with my parents this summer.

Other than those two things, though, nothing much has changed. I'm still a college student; I still work on my photography and writing books. However, because of working full time, I can't find much time to do things.

But, don't fret. I was able to get next week off to go on a road trip with my best friend for my birthday week. I am beyond excited. We are heading up to the mountains of North Carolina and then headed to the coastline. It will be good to get out of this city and to explore the country a bit. I'm so ready for it, that I've already packed up all of my stuff! Haha.

Anyway, the reason I am writing this post today is because I wanted to talk about something that's been on my mind for a few weeks. It will get a bit personal, but I feel like God is asking me to share this with you guys.

First off, I wanted to talk a bit about my testimony. Some of you may know what happened to me a few years ago and some of you may not. For those who do not know, let me give you a shortened version. (If we ever meet in person, I'd love to tell you the entire story.)


When I entered high school, I didn't realize how hard it was going to be to keep my faith. I had so many people spread rumors about me and ridicule me for my beliefs. I began to stray away from God because of all of it. I started to hang out with the wrong crowd and became more and more distraught and distant from everybody who used to hang out with me. 

I didn't want to believe there was a God. I began to curse and to rebel against everything I used to believe in. (No, I did not start drinking or smoking. I still didn't like people who did that.) Don't get me wrong. I was pressured into drinking and smoking. The people I hung out with were the ones who partied every weekend and who used sex as a means out of their troubles. I may not have been into this, but there were times when I seriously considered it. 

It was in tenth grade that everything came to a screeching halt. I argued with my parents all the time and there was morning when it got so bad that I told my mother that I hated her. It was that morning that I began to cut myself to feel relief from the pain I was in. It was that morning that my life just felt like it was going down the drain.


Now, obviously, I'm still here today. I am alive and healthy. I don't cut or harm myself anymore. I've healed from that even though I still have scars lining my body. I was never sent to a doctor and was never medically claimed depressed. I diagnosed myself. It wasn't until the summer after tenth grade that I began to work towards my healing.

The reason I want to talk about this is because it has been three years since this has happened. It has been three years since I last placed a knife to my skin. It has been three years since I last thought I wasn't worth anything. It has been three years since I last wanted to end my life. It has been three years since I was reborn in my Savior's arms.

I'm not telling you guys this because I want you guys to feel sorry for me or to make it seem like I've gotten it all together since then. I still stumble. There are times when I get so frustrated or so upset with my life that I want to go back to my old ways. But, I don't. I take a deep breath and go spend time with my Creator instead.

I now realize that I can end the pain with healthier options. I don't have to resort to self-harm to get through something that is difficult in my life.

When you see/meet me, you will notice the scars. They are etched into my skin. They are noticeable. They are there and I am aware of it. Yes, it is hard sometimes to tell the story of my few months spent in a dark abyss called depression. Especially to people I've know for years and years. I've gotten better at it, but it's still hard. However, I trust that the Lord will provide me with the words I need.

With my "dark" past, I used to think that people were a little intimidated by me. I used to think that because I had these scars, other people wouldn't know what to do with me. I was terrified to think that people wouldn't want to try to understand what happened to me. I know that some people are just scared to deal with others who have done the things I have.

Things are quite different, actually. In the past year, after going to college, I have found so many people that support me. They have listened to my story and still love me for who I am. They don't shy away at mention of my scars and are always there for me when I need a shoulder to lean on. They love me for who I am. I am so blessed by them.

I also want to reach out a hand to anybody who feels like they have been dealing with what I dealt with. You are not alone. You are loved. You are amazing. Don't let anybody tell you anything different. Be you and know that there are people out there who love you for you. I want to leave you guys with a letter. I have this letter framed for my dorm room at school and always look back on it in times of struggle. Feel free to do the same.




Dear Sons and Daughters,

I want to remind you today that you are beautiful.  As you know there is a father of lies who will try to deceive you.  He will tell you that you aren’t attractive enough, good enough or smart enough.  He will tempt you to doubt Me and then, after you do, he will accuse you of being a failure. He will also tell you that you have broken too many promises, lived one too many lies, and fallen one too many times.  He will try to discourage you and tell you you’ve been going in the wrong direction and that it is pointless to turn  back now. “You,” he hisses, “Are unimportant to God.”
Guess what?  You do not belong to him. He is not your father.  I AM.  I am your King.  You are born of my thought! Every part of you I carefully put together by My hands.  You have my thumbprint on your life. You are my workmanship! You are My creation! You are my joy! My very own sons and daughters!

You not loved because you are precious.  You are precious because you are loved…by Me your KING!  There is nothing that can separate you from my love.  There is no ocean too deep. There is no mountain too high.  Yes, sin did change my perfect creation. Yes, you live in a broken, fallen world.  Every human being is born in sin because of Adam and Eve’s disobedience.  However, I could not turn my back on them.  I will not turn my back on you.  I robed myself in flesh and came to earth to pay for you with my own blood.  I am your redeemer and you are covered with My grace.  I have done everything  there is to do and given all there is to give–for you!  Your life is precious because I created it and redeemed it!  My love for you is everlasting, unfailing and eternal.

The father of lies may whisper in your ear; “Did God really say…?” He ignites flames of doubts.  But I am unchangeable.  My Word is truth.  I desire to spend time with you, every moment of every day.  My love for you never grows cold.  My promises are never broken.  My character never changes.  You, my child, have been made in my image.  You are beautiful.  You have purpose.  You have destiny. You have hope in every situation, because of Me.
I love you unconditionally, dearly and completely.  I know your emotions.  I see your tears.  I see your thoughts.  When you don’t know what to pray, My Spirit prays for you with words deeper than any sigh. I know all about you.  I know your secrets, fears, weaknesses and failures.  None of this changes my love for you.  My faithfulness is eternal.  Learn of Me! Believe Me! Trust Me! Find order in the midst of your chaos with Me.  Begin each day with me. Calm your nights with Me.  Entrust your heart to Me, I hold it close to my own.

Forever & faithfully yours,

Your Heavenly Father/Your King




If you ever want to ask more about my story, feel free to ask me. I can explain more about my depression and what was happening in my head. All you have to do is ask.

And remember: YOU are loved by the Creator of the earth, by the One who placed the stars in the sky, by the King of kings.

Love and be loved.

My testimony on YouTube.

Selfish

I am filled with the Holy Spirit tonight.

Today had been rough. I got up early to take a biology exam, and then was in class until five. I then worked on homework and papers and studied for tests until 8:30, even forgetting to eat dinner because I was so busy.

I was overwhelmed. I was hungry. I just wanted to go to sleep. I was done with the day.

My plan was to eat something real quick and then go to bed.

Well...plans change.

I decided to run down to the food court to grab something to eat and when I got outside, my breath was taken away. I looked up to the sky and found that it was a beautiful, clear night. The stars and moon were out and there wasn't a cloud to be seen.

I didn't think anything of it and continued to the food court to get dinner. There, I grabbed a decaf coffee, a granola bar and a bottle of water. I went back outside to my car and was once again floored at the beauty of the night.

That's when the plans changed.

I got into my car, put my top down and drove up to Mountain Campus. I blasted my Passion CD the way up there (I gave up worldly music for Lent) and tried to find some peace.

Once up there, I pulled into a dark parking lot, grabbed my star gazing pillow and blanket from the trunk and sat in the back of my car. I turned on Oceans by Hillsong and put it on repeat. Then, sat back, drank my coffee and watched the sky.

After about the third time the song head played, I began to feel lighter. Everything seemed to be clearer and I was even able to smile a bit. Warmth radiated throughout my body and I wasn't cold anymore.

By the fifth repeat, I began to cry.

God is immeasurably good to me. I don't know how to put into words how blessed I am by the Father. Recently, I've forgotten to pray to God in my times of trouble and to praise Him in the good times. I have been selfish and underserving of His love. And yet, He loves me still.

While I was sitting under the stars, so many verses and quotes came to mind.

"God is in the midst of her; she should not be moved." (Psalm 46:5)

"Be strong and courageous for the Lord you God goes with you."

"Be patient. God isn't finished with you yet." (Philippians 1:6)

"God will provide." (Philippians 4:19)

One in particular stayed with me while I sat up there:

"God's love is meteoric. His loyalty is astronomic; His purpose titanic; His verdicts oceanic. Yet, in His largeness, nothing gets lost; not a man, not a mouse slips through the cracks." (Psalm 36:10)

That verse is one of my new favorites. It captures everything that I felt tonight. I had been overwhelmed with the world and not concerned at all about my God. But here's the thing. God still loves me. You hear that?

God. Still. Loves. Me.

STILL.

How amazing is that? No matter what happens, God is and always will be there for me. His love is unconditional. I am breathless at the thought.

I can't iterate enough how blessed I am to have this life. God is so, so good to me. And He is so, so good to all of you. Let me leave you with a few sentences that I will tell myself every night.

May you find a moment of peace and quiet tonight to thank God for all that is right in your world. May you have the presence of mind to release your cares and worries to Him. May you have the gritty faith to grab a firmer grip on His promises to you. And may you wake up in the morning knowing that you've gained ground even during your sleeping hours because God is always moving on your behalf. As you entrust your whole self to Him today, He'll get you where you need to go tomorrow. Sleep well tonight.

He is faithful. Always. 

Single and Loved

Happy Valentine's Day everyone! (Or is it "Happy Singles Awareness Day"?) Personally, I prefer "Happy Discounted-Chocolate Eve".

As this day had come closer and closer I began to find that many people are complaining. Either it's the single people complaining about the couples or the the couples complaining about the single people. No matter which way it is, it's pretty annoying. I mean, I will admit that I have complained about being single. (Who hasn't?) I have made fun of the in-love couples around campus and even rolled my eyes at a lot of them.

But, let's get one thing straight. I am in no way anti-Valentine's Day. I'm not. It gets tough being single when this day comes around, but I know in my heart and mind that if I did have someone to spend it with, then I would enjoy the holiday.

In this society, however, this holiday reinforces that feeling of being single and being surrounded by couples. Walking in to a convenience store, I am bombarded with flowers and balloons and cards and candy. All of these come with signs proclaiming how they are the "perfect gift for that special someone". Um, excuse me?

Why does society force the idea of being in a relationship on us? Why am I looked at with pity when I am buying ice cream and chocolates (for a girl's night tonight, by the way)? Why is it so hard for society to realize that some of us are perfectly happy being single?

If you remember from my "Unwanted" post (click on the link to read it), I talk about how it is hard to be single in college. And that still holds true to this day. It's hard to watch couples walk around holding hands or kissing outside the buildings. I have those days when I absolutely loathe being single.

I have friends who are either in a relationship or they have someone they're "talking to". Whenever I'm around these friends, it gets very easy to feel left out or like the third wheel. I become too easily aware of my singleness.

It's during those times that I (stupidly, of course) begin to question God. I ask Him, "Why? Why haven't You placed someone in my life? Why am I the one who is single? Where is my 'Prince Charming'? Is it because I don't dress cute all the time? Maybe I should lose some weight first. Am I not sweet enough? not charming enough? not pretty enough? not funny enough?"

The list of questions and doubts goes on and on. It goes until I am on my knees, crying...cursing at God. "Why am I alone? Why have You left me alone?"

It was only a few days ago when I heard a quiet answer:

"My Daughter, I have never left you alone. I have always been here. However, you were never looking for Me. You...your eyes have been searching for that 'Mr. Right'. You have become blind to My presence. Do you not realize what this life--your life--has been about? Let me show you...."

I look back over my life. I remember reading every fairy tale imaginable. I had always imagined growing up and finding my own Prince Charming. He would sweep me off my feet, carry me off on a white horse and we would live happily ever after. It seemed like the perfect life to grow up in to.

Today, I look back on those fairy tales and realize that I had become too focused on the idea of Prince Charming as the real hero. What I didn't know is that he is just a reflection--an ideal manifestation--of the true Prince.

These stories were never the whole picture. They just pointed me to the ultimate love story; one where a Man gave up His life for mine (and everybody else's) on a cross more than 2000 years ago just to show me (and the world) what true love really is.

Okay, here's the thing. I'm single. I'm 18 years old, never been kissed, never had a real boyfriend and am a freshman in college. And you know what? I'm content in that. I used to think that I wasn't, but really, I am.

The reason for this is because I have the unwavering, unconditional love of my God to sustain me for the rest of my days. Whether God places a man in my life or not, I will be content. It isn't my will to be done, but His.

Today, I have had my Contemporary Christian Pandora station on all hours. During this time, I've heard a few songs that perfectly describe my love for God and His love for me.

"I love you more than the sun

And the stars that I taught how to shine.

You are mine, and you shine for me too.

I love you yesterday and today

And tomorrow, I'll say it again and again

I love you more."

("More" Matthew West)

"At the cross, You beckon me

You draw me gently to my knees

And I am lost for words, so lost in love

I'm sweetly broken, wholly surrendered"

("Sweetly Broken" Jeremy Riddle)

"Step out on the edge

Don't be afraid of it

And when you feel the rain

Call His name

He'll find you in the hurricane.

"Don't back down from the fight

He'll shelter you tonight

Just hold on for the change

Call His name

He'll find you in the hurricane"

("Hurricane" Natalie Grant)

"I'm the street light thats guide you home

I'll be the GPS when you've lost your phone

I'll be the song that's rockin' in your headphones

I'll show you the signs

To let you know

You'll never be alone."

("You'll Never Be Alone" Capitol Kings)

I am so loved. And the One who loves me? I love Him, too. I know that He will never let me go. I can trust in Him to have my life planned out for me. And, now, I will never doubt Him again. 

Priceless

I know... It's been a while since I have posted and I am sorry. I've had a lot of things on my plate for the past few weeks and I had to push my blog to the side so I could get those things completed. During these past weeks, though, I've been feeling a little down. I'm have good grades, a great job, great friends, etc. So, why is it that I've been going to sleep at night feeling a little empty and drained (emotionally, physically, spiritually)?

I really didn't know what was going on with me. I mean, yes, I've had a little bit of drama and confusion going on in my life. I have a friend who I am helping through depression and I have a friend, who, all of a sudden, just stopped speaking to me. (I mean, we go from talking every single day to barely speaking at all if any.) It hurts. I know that when helping others through depression, I have to be careful and keep myself happy and healthy. And I have been doing just that. So, I couldn't place a finger on the problem that I was having....

Until this morning...

This morning started as any other. I woke up, took a quick shower and then got back in bed to study a little and relax. It was a Saturday, after all. I was laying in my bed, looking through some notes for my Animal Science class when I got a text from my mom. I thought it was a little weird because it is a Saturday and it was about 9 o'clock in the morning where she is. Well, of course, I opened the text, not really expecting much. What I got, left me speechless and with tears in my eyes.

Because this text was personal and between me and my mom, I won't share it word for word, but I will say that I was finally able to figure out what was going on with me.

You see, for the past few weeks, I was, in lack of better words, putting a price on myself. I was walking around my campus proclaiming that I was to be bought at a price and that you had to prove that you could "buy me", per say. I was degrading myself and others around me. I wasn't being the person that God wants me to be. I wasn't being me.

I was allowing these other people define who I was. That guy who kind of broke my heart? He told me that I wasn't worth the time. The girl who snickered at me in class? She told me that I was a loser. Those students who stared and gossiped as I curled up in a chair by myself with a thick book? They told me that I was a loner and a nerd.

I listened to them. I listened and took it all in until I was believing those things myself. I was beginning to get self conscious as I walked around campus with my books and my geeky clothes and my weird music. I was letting people (some of them who I didn't even know) determine who I was.

And now? Now, I am done with being that girl that everybody thinks I am. I just want to be me; to be the me that God made with His own hands. And you know who that is?

GEEKY.

SMART.

BEAUTIFUL.

CONFIDENT.

COMPASSIONATE

CARING.

OPTIMISTIC.

HARD WORKING.

SENSITIVE.

IMPERFECT.

BRAVE.

IMPORTANT.

PRICELESS.

I. AM. PRICELESS.

I have a value...but, here's the catch: my value is greater than that of the entire world's. God sees me as a treasure. He says, "That is a precious piece and I am willing to pay ANY AMOUNT to acquire it!" How amazing is that? The creator of the Earth said that about me! And He says that about each and every one of you!

I know, now, that it is so important to recognize the value that God gives us. We should never forget it.

After reading that text from my mom, I was so overwhelmed by the love flowing from the Father. I began reading through my Bible and journal, looking at the words Christ has spoken to and through me. Peace immediately began settling through me and I began feeling so much better. I felt stronger, physically, emotionally and spiritually.

So, my words to you are: Don't forget what you are worth. Your Father in Heaven created you with a purpose and He knows exactly what He's doing. He sees you as a priceless treasure and that is how you should see yourself as well. Don't let others determine who you are in life.

This song came over my playlist today and I feel that it perfectly with what I was feeling. The song is "Gold" by Britt Nicole. I love her so much and all of her songs can always make me instantly feel better. If you click here, you can watch the music video. These lyrics speak so much truth, though. You are worth much more than gold. Don't let others decide who you are. BE YOU.

"Gold"

Britt Nicole

Oh, oh, oh, oh

Oh, oh, oh, oh

You were walking on the moon, now you're feeling low

What they said wasn't true, you're beautiful

Sticks and stones break your bones, I know what you're feeling

Words like those won't steal your glow, you're one in a million

This, this is for all the girls, boys all over the world

Whatever you've been told, you're worth more than gold

So hold your head up high, it's your time to shine

From the inside out it shows, you're worth more than gold

(Gold gold, you're gold)

You're worth more than gold

(Gold gold, you're gold)

Well everybody keeps score, afraid you're gonna lose

Just ignore they don't know the real you

All the rain in the sky can't put out your fire

Of all the stars out tonight, you shine brighter

This, this is for all the girls, boys all over the world

Whatever you've been told, you're worth more than gold

So hold your head up high, it's your time to shine

From the inside out it shows, you're worth more than gold

(Gold gold, you're gold)

You're worth more than gold

(Gold gold, you're gold)

So don't let anybody tell you that you're not loved

And don't let anybody tell you that you're not enough

Yeah there are days that we all feel like we're messed up

But the truth is that we're all diamonds in the rough

So don't be ashamed to wear your crown

You're a king you're a queen inside and out

You glow like the moon, you shine like the stars

This is for you, wherever you are

Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, oh, oh,

You're gold

This, this is for all the girls, boys all over the world

Whatever you've been told, you're worth more than gold

(So hold your head) So hold your head up high,

It's your time to shine

From the inside out it shows, you're worth more than gold

(gold gold, you're gold)

You're worth more than gold

(gold gold you're gold)

So don't be ashamed to wear your crown

You're a king you're a queen inside and out