Hosanna

Let me be the first to say that I do not always ask for help when needed. I like to do things on my own and anytime I have to ask for help, I feel weak. I feel utterly and embarrassingly weak. So, I don't ask for help. I keep my problems to myself and don't let anyone else have access to them. Not even God.

I spent years not allowing myself to be vulnerable. I refused to let other people deal with my "problems". I mean, I was even told this past spring by someone who I thought was very close to me that I wasn't worth their time or patience...that my "problems" and "issues" were too much. I took those words very close to heart and began to pull away even more. That someone soon disappeared from my life, but their words never did.

This past April, I entered in to a relationship with a guy I met through a dating site. (Crazy, right?) We hit it off pretty well and it wasn't long until we were dating and seeing each other almost every day throughout the summer.

I swore that with this relationship, I was going to be more upfront about the things I deal with on a daily basis. However, I still found myself holding back. I didn't my "issues" to become his burdens. I had this skewed view of relationships, whether they were friendly or romantic, and I didn't want to cause anyone any trouble.

My newfound relationship was way different than the one I had been in before and I found myself comparing the two at the beginning. I wondered for a week or two if I had rushed into things. But I knew in my heart, that I wasn't doing that and that this guy was in my life for a reason.

Even though I left my old, toxic relationship with my ex behind, I still refused to listen to any of the music we listened to together, refused to watch movies we had seen, didn't play the video games we used to play and didn't even want to step foot in the places we had been. I would tell my boyfriend to take me somewhere else, would change the radio station and would convince him to watch a different movie.

It took me a couple months to realize that this wasn't healthy. That my new relationship wouldn't thrive if I kept holding back. So, I began to open up a little more. I became more myself. I found myself being able to watch those movies and go to those places. The one thing I was still struggling with was "that song".

You know which song I'm talking about. Every relationship has one. That song that you both listen to all the time. Whether it be the first song you both heard together, or the first song you kissed/danced/sang along to. It's "your song". (My current boyfriend and I have one-- "H.O.L.Y" by Florida Georgia Line. We listen to it in the car all the time and always end up singing it to each other. It was a song that connected us.)

Well, at risk of sounding silly, my ex and I loved the "I Lava You" song from that Pixar short before Inside Out. You know, the one with the talking volcanoes? (Here's the link!) Well, after he and I broke up, any part of that song would kill me. I couldn't bear to listen to it. And I buried the memories deep deep inside of me.

Fast forward to a few weeks ago. This song began to play on my phone and a friend told me to turn it up as she loved this song. Instead of doing as she asked, I quickly skipped the song as it still brought back bad memories. She questioned my motives and I dodged the question and burning look in her eyes and told her that I was just tired of hearing it all the time on my playlist. She dropped it.

Then today. I was sitting in the office at work and a co worker was playing throwback Disney songs as I studied. Soon he said my name and when I looked up, he told me that the next song was going to hit me in my feels. I was confused but smiled anyways. He skipped to that song. (He had no idea what that song meant to me.) I tensed up at first, but soon he was singing along to the song and I quickly joined in. The frozen smile on my face thawed and grew. I began to laugh as we sang to this silly Disney song and I realized that for the first time in a very long time, I felt free and at peace with my life.

I also realized that if I had just been honest in the first place and asked for help in getting over that ex and transitioning into a new relationship, things would've been much smoother sailing for me.

I've also realized in the past few months that I shouldn't be scared to ask for help. To be honest with you guys, I've started seeing a therapist. Berry offers free counseling services to students and my parents and I thought it would be very helpful to me and the people in my life if I began to talk to someone. And, to my utter disbelief, it did help.

The ability to talk to someone for a hour nonstop can be quite scary. At first, I didn't think I wanted to go. I didn't want to be weak and ask for help. But, I came to discover that talking to someone who isn't directly involved in your life can be very uplifting and liberating. All the burdens on my shoulders began to disappear and I haven't felt this light in years.

There are two songs I've been listening to for the past week nonstop. And they speak everything to me. The first is "It is Well With My Soul" (the Matt Redman version). This song is proclaims endless joy. Contrary to popular belief, these lyrics aren't shouting out that everything is okay. Because we all know it isn't. However, our God is still in control. Those words are saying that the old will is gone and the new will has come! It is a reminder that, while we don't understand the hurt we go through, we can always turn to a God that does understand and who will comfort us in all times.

The other song is "Hosanna" by Hillsong. This is such a favorite of mine. The word 'hosanna' means an expression of adoration or joy. This is how I've felt the past few months. The joy that I have in my life (after realizing that it's okay to ask for help sometimes) is the greatest it's ever been. This song speaks so much truth in my heart and I want to shout this song from the rooftops.

So, while I'm the first to tell you that I don't like to ask for help, I will also be the first to tell you that asking for help is the best thing you could ever do to help your physical, mental, AND spiritual health. It definitely did that for me. Even if you start out by asking God for help, it's a step in the right direction.

"Then they cried to the LORD in their trouble, And He brought them out of their distresses. He caused the storm to be still, So that the waves of the sea were hushed. Then they were glad because they were quiet, So He guided them to their desired haven." (Psalm 107:28-30)

"This is the confidence which we have before Him, that, if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests which we have asked from Him." (1 John 5:14-15)

In His Name.

Healing

Wow. It's pretty early, huh? Or pretty late, depending on which way you look at things. Haha. I woke up a few hours ago and just couldn't go back to sleep. So, instead, I picked up my Bible and began to read, hoping that I would be able to get tired enough to fall back asleep.

While reading I came across this verse: "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my  righteous right hand." (Isaiah 41:10)

The past few weeks have honestly been quite hellish for me. On March 1st, I was admitted into the hospital for DKA (diabetic ketoacidosis). This basically means I wasn't taking care of my Type 1 Diabetes like I should've been doing and my blood sugars got too high and wouldn't come back down. I spent the rest of the week in the hospital trying to get better.

I then came home for my spring break to hopefully relax and get my health back in shape before the rest of the semester. However, little did I know that another blow would be waiting for me. Just yesterday morning, my boyfriend of six months called me over to his place and broke up with me. I won't go into details, but obviously, it hurt. A lot. I spent the rest of the day crying in bed and unwilling to motivate myself to do anything, really. So I assume that's why I couldn't really sleep tonight. With all of this on my mind, it makes it hard to relax enough to want to sleep.

It was right after I read that verse above that I felt God with me. I felt His presence near me as I cried while reading that verse over and over again. He placed His hand on my shoulder and whispered:

"Kaitlyn, my beautiful daughter, do not worry. Do not fear. I am with you every step of the way. I will not let you fall. Trust in me. Lean on me. Cast all your burdens on me and I will make you whole again. Do not worry or stress about what is to come. It is all in My hands. Let My will be done. I will never forsake you."

Those words He spoke over me soothed my soul. I know that healing my heart will take time. But I also know that I have a God on my side that will always be there for me no matter what.

So, I decided that I am going to take five specific steps in my life to make myself whole again.

1. I'm going to start living a healthier lifestyle.

There is no need for me to allow myself to wallow in self-pity or guilt and eat all the junk food I can manage. While I may indulge once or twice, I've decided to start working on becoming a healthier me. So, I'm going to start eating right and exercising more often. I honestly want to start running again and start training for 5ks, 10ks, and maybe even a half-marathon. This way, too, my diabetes will be better managed and I won't be feeling so run down anymore.

2. I'm going to spend time with friends.

I haven't done that much this semester (or even last semester) and I feel awful about that. I believe that healing myself will come more easily if I am surrounded by those whom I love and who love me back. So, I'm going to start going out with friends more, taking more adventures with them and just kicking back and having fun.

3. I'm going to dig into the Word.

This one is important. I feel that my spiritual health has also been declining recently and I am so ashamed of that. So, I'm going to start reading my Bible daily and start praying endlessly to God. He needs to become number one in my life again and I'm going to make sure that happens as soon as possible.

4. I'm going to forgive.

This one is also very important. I'm the type of person who can and will hold a grudge for a very long time. I need to learn how to undo that and control my feelings better. So, I'm going to start by forgiving myself. I can't blame myself for everything that has happened. It's not fair to me. And it just drags me down even more than I already am dragged down by current situations. I'm also going to forgive those who may have hurt me. There's no need for me to be angry at all these people all the time. It's not healthy. And if I do continue to be angry and hold a grudge, I won't be able to properly move on with my life.

5. I'm going to love myself.

We all have issues of self-worth. When my boyfriend broke up with me, all I could think was "I'm obviously not good enough. What's wrong with me? What happened? He deserves better than me." et cetera, et cetera. I was beating myself down. I told myself that I wasn't worthy of his (or anybody's) attention. That I didn't deserve to love and be loved in return. When, in reality, that is so not true. I deserve all of that and more. So, on this road to healing, I'm going to love myself. I'm going to work on boosting my self-confidence so that I can proclaim every minute of every hour of every day that "I am worth loving."

It's time for me to take a step back and start healing. And it may be time for some of you to do that as well. All I can say is: Kudos to you for taking that step. I know (I swear I do) that making that decision was a hard one. Sometimes, all we want to do is be upset and hurt and angry. But if we allow ourselves to do that, we will never move forward in life and will continue to hurt others along the way.

Be on the lookout for another post in the upcoming weeks about my progress to healing. These past few weeks were a wake up call for me. I'm ready to take on life and to make myself whole again, with friends, family, and most importantly, God, by my side every step of the way.

Unconditional

Hey guys! Its been a few weeks since I've posted anything but I've had a few things I wanted to share with you today. After returning home from school for the summer, I had a wedding photography job lined up for two close friends of mine. So, on Mothers Day, I took off for a beautiful afternoon of taking pictures.

And let me tell you...these pictures turned out so so well!! The amount of love between this couple was so raw and so photogenic that I bawled (a couple of times)! Here are a few of the pictures:

As you can see, these two love each other so, very much. I have watched their love grow from just starting to date to fiancées to now a married couple. To be quite honest, their love is the love I want with my future husband.

This brings me to my topic of the day: love.

I have told you guys before that ever since I was a little girl, I have wanted a love to rival the greatest loves of all time. I'm a true romantic at heart. I want someone to hold me, someone I can tell my fears and doubts to, someone to love me for who I truly am. I want that so much, that I let it consume me sometimes.

But I've already talked about myself in this category before, so let me talk about someone(s) else for a change.

You see, when I think of my future husband/relationship, all I see are my parents. That's right. My parents are my true inspiration for my relationships.

My parents, I feel, are the true definition of a Christ-like love. They love each other unconditionally...no matter how many times my dad annoys my mom or how crazy my mom seems to make my dad.

These guys have been married for 15+ years and their love continues to grow stronger and stronger with each passing year. I've witnessed firsthand all the ups and downs of their relationship.

They definitely have had their fights. I have been there for meltdowns, blow-ups, and just the general yelling. (And I may have even been the cause for some of those. Haha!)

But here's the thing...they forgive each other. No matter what. They don't let their fights define their relationship. They go back to each other and make up. No matter who is at fault or who "threw the first punch" (figuratively of course).

That's love, you guys.

I cannot begin to explain to you guys how inspired I am by these two. Throughout my life, they have taught me what true, real, raw love looks like. They have shown me that you must love God first before letting anybody else into your heart. Through them, I've seen that you must place God in the center of your relationship if you want it to go anywhere.

These two beautiful human beings have shown me all there is to know about love. I couldn't ask for two better role models for myself or my siblings.

Just as 1 Corinthians says, "Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things".

Remember, we all love because He first loved all of us. (1 John 4:19)

So, thank you, mom and dad, for showing me Who to turn to when times get tough and for being who you guys are. Thank you for showing me what true, Christ-centered love looks like and for inspiring me in my own relationships with others. I love you two so very much and couldn't ask for two better parents.

In His love. 

Redeemed

"Yet, O Lord, You are our Father. We are the clay, You are the potter; we are all the work of Your hand." (Isaiah 64:8)

We are a broken people.

We live in a broken world.

As humans, we all are broken and shattered and no where near perfect.

But see, that's not the end of our lives.

Our lives are not our own stories. It is not---it was never--about us and us alone. This life, this wonderful, glorious life that we live is all about Him and about us coming to be a part of His story. 

The verse that I started this post off with is a verse that has been on my mind for a few weeks now. If you go to church on a regular basis or have been a Christian for a few years or more, I'm sure you've heard this verse a lot. A verse that likens us to clay and God to the potter. 

God took us from an image in His mind and he created us. He formed us all uniquely and all for Him. We were created to serve Him and all He does for us. 

I just love the idea of us being clay in His hands. Before He touches us, we are formless. We are void of life, of soul. The moment that He begins His work in us, we become full of life, of love. We are beautiful creations--works--of His own hand. 

But, the thing about clay is that it is continually worked and reshaped to the potter's likings. The potter does not rest until he is satisfied with his work. This also means that the clay must be willing to be reformed into something new.

As the clay of His hands, we, as God's sons and daughters must be yielded and still. We have to allow God to shape us with his hands. There are three things that I see that we must be able to do and go through in order for God to shape us:

1. Patience--In order for God to be able to mold us into people He would like for us to be, we must have patience. We cannot and must not be impatient as that does not do anything for us. Impatience causes stress and unhappiness. Patience, on the other hand, fills us with life and with happiness.

2. We must be willing to be destroyed. Sometimes, the potter needs to start all over again. To do so, the old pottery must be destroyed so that a new one can take its place. It's hard to be willing to be destroyed. We love our lives and sometimes we don't want to change. Change is hard. But God promises to bring joy with the change. When old doors close, new ones open and that's what we know to be true. God's promises never break.

3. Allow God to treat us with tenderness. Just as clay is slowly and tenderly formed into a pot, God places His hands softly on us to form us. He is never rough nor does he rip and tear at us. His love washes over us and He holds us carefully in His arms. 

We need to stop taking our heart out of His hands. He knows what is best for us and we need to let Him hold our hearts. That's what I mean when I say that we must be yielded and still. We need to let Him form us. 

There's an old saying that goes: "My life in Your hands; my ways for Your plans".

One more thing I wanted to mention about this is that when you look at a potter, what do you see? What are they covered in?

Clay.

They are covered from head to toe in the clay that they have been working with.

This is another image that I'm in love with. God, our potter, is covered in clay. He is covered in us. So that we may be covered and clothed in righteousness. God became flesh and put on our clay and was hung on that cross. 

He wore it so we didn't have to. He became dirty and muddy and downright filthy so that we can become beautiful and priceless in His image. 

How amazing is that?

As I leave this with you guys today, I just want say, surrender yourselves to the Potter. Because through Him, we are redeemed. 

In His love.

Full

Today, I went on a drive in the rain.

For those of you who know me, I go on a drive about once a week to take a step back from everything and to jam out in the confines of my car. I like to get away from all the drama and stresses of life to just relax and take some deep breaths.

I haven't been on a drive in a few weeks, and I felt that I needed one today, so I packed up my stuff and set out.

I drove all over the place. I went to the edges of the city of Rome and then back to Berry and up to Mountain Campus. Once up there, I parked by Swan Lake and settled in. Then, I did something that honestly surprised me.

I cried.

I cried and I cried and I cried.

I cried until I had no tears left. I sat in a car by a lake (while it poured outside) with absolutely nobody else around and sobbed my heart out.

Why?

Well, to be quite frank with you all, I was overwhelmed with life...with everything that was going on around me. So many different things were pressing onto my shoulders--burden after burden came crashing down--so that when I finally stepped away from it all, the waterworks started.

But here's the thing, I also cried because I remembered that while I have so much stress on me and while there are burdens coming at me from all angles, I have people--fabulous relationships--in my life who make it so much easier to live.

So, I wanted to talk about the relationships in our lives and what it means to have a Godly relationship with someone.

I have learned through past experiences--through betrayal, slander, back-stabbing, and gossip--that some relationships with people just aren't meant to last. They are what we call seasonal friendships and God only sets them there for a little while and takes them away again. We weren't meant to have those people in our lives. Yes, it hurts when they go away or when they do something against you, but God doesn't want you to be friends or have relationships with people who are a detriment to your growth and enrichment.

It's also not enough that we should only want someone who is trustworthy, loyal, and kind. It is so very important that we also strive to be that type of person to someone else. That's what feeds healthy relationships: that connection when both persons are loyal and kind to one another.

It is such a blessing to have people in my life who can tell when I've had a rough day or week. These people can immediately read my mood and will work to make me smile or laugh. They will pray for me when I need it or even when I don't need it. In fact, to have someone who prays for me daily with no motive or reason in mind is absolutely stunning. Not people who talk about me behind my back or judge me for how I act, but people who pray for me without ceasing.

It's not an easy journey--making and leaving friends. God essentially knows what you need and has an exact plan set out for you and for the people who will be in your life. He will quickly weed out those who do not fit in with His plan and when He does, it's easy to rebuke Him. But un-Godly friendships and relationships are detrimental to us. They feed us wrongful thoughts and lead us into temptations that take us further from God.

However, those Godly relationships that we have, build us up. The purpose of these friendships is to help one another in their walk with God. Proverbs 2:17 says: "As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend. This friendship is not a crutch for one person to lean on because each person is founded on God and not on one another. It is bonded by their love for God and for their obedience to His Word. It gives without expecting anything in return. That is what a Godly relationship is.

Earlier this week, I was having a rough time with life. I was stressed from the amount of tests I had and wasn't getting enough sleep at nights. I was exhausted and cranky and just didn't want to hang out with anybody.

Then, I got a text from one of my closest friends here at school. He wrote to me about how I am such a blessing to him and just wanted to let me know that he loves me and is always praying for me no matter what.

Obviously, that made me tear up because, unknowingly, I desperately needed to hear those words from someone.

That next day, I had the chance to sit with a friend and just talk about life. We didn't talk about anything specific, just pondered about life and what it holds for us and what God is doing in our lives. She didn't realize this, but I absolutely cherished those moments with her. I was able to get away from everything for a minute and talk about life with someone I care for very deeply. She is one of my best friends and I am beyond blessed to be able to come to her to talk about struggles and accomplishments.

That being said, I know I have friends who will always be there for me, who will never leave me and who will talk to me and with me about anything and everything.

Before I close out, I want to say something to my friends out there:

Thank you. Thank you for being there for me. Thank you for believing in me and for accepting me; for praying without ceasing for me; for aiding me in my walk with Christ. I have no idea where I would be without any of you guys in my life and I can't thank my God enough for placing you in my life to begin with. I love you guys dearly and would not trade you for the world. 

Think about those relationships in your life. Who do you really count on when times get tough? Who is God telling you to move towards or away from?

In His love.

Needy and Free

Yes, you read that right.

I, Kaitlyn, am needy.

I am so needy, actually, that's it's quite embarrassing to some people.

But, you see, the things that I'm needy for, aren't the things that other people are needy for.

What I'm needy for is:

Friendship.

Quiet time.

My Bible.

Family.

Life.

And most importantly, I'm needy for God.

Yep. God. I find myself in constant need of Him in my life. I cannot go a day without Him. He is my rock and my refuge.

See, some people believe that they do not need God to live their lives. They believe that if they have a great career, a good home, a fantastic family, then there in no need for a higher power in their individual lives. But, without God, they lack something vitally important.

The something is a desire for a purpose for life or a lasting significance.

Without God, there is no purpose for life whatsoever. Which basically means that we are accidents in this world.

But we're not. We are not accidents. We were designed. And since we were designed, we now have purpose for living.

To find your purpose in life is quite difficult sometimes. Trust me. There are days when I go around wondering what I am doing with my life. And then there are days in which I know exactly what I am doing, where I am going and who I am.

There are days when I just want to stay in bed because I feel like there's no point in taking on the day. And then there are days when I jump out of bed with a smile on my face, ready to get things done.

But there is one thing that stays the same: my purpose for God.

You see, we were put on this earth to serve Him. He created us. He sent His one and only Son to die for us. He deserves something in return. He deserves our praise and our devotion to Him.

My purpose for God is to go out and spread His word. I am called to make disciples in His name. Jesus called all of us to make disciples. In Matthew 28:19 He says: "Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit".

That is my purpose in life.

To serve God and by doing so, bringing others to Him.

That is why I need God. I need Him because without Him, I would not have a purpose in my life. I would be without desire to live. I wouldn't want to be on this world without Him.

Today at church, this whole idea of needing God in my life was brought home by one song. Matt Maher's "Lord, I Need You". (Great title, huh?)

Click here to listen to the song. One verse particularly sticks out to me:

"And where You are, Lord I am free
Holiness, is Christ in me."

Those two lines are everything to me. Everything.

I am free in Christ. I am holy because Christ is in me. I am not chained down by my sins or my transgressions. No matter what I go through in life, I have Christ and Christ lives in me.

I AM FREE BECAUSE OF CHRIST.

I am going to shout it from the rooftops.

I. AM. FREE. BECAUSE. CHRIST. DIED. FOR. ME.

And you! You are free because Christ died for you!

Basically, that's what this life is all about. We live because He died.

So....LIVE.

In His love.

Kindness

As many of you guys know, the season of Lent started this past Wednesday.

For those of you who don't know what Lent is, let me explain really quickly.

Lent is a season of sacrifice. We are supposed to "give up" something we love for forty days in order to grow closer to God. This can be anything in your life: from junk food to sarcasm. But the point is to focus more clearly of God and His promises for us. It's like a sort of fast for us. (Now, some people really do fast and give up all food during the day. But other denominations just give up a few small things or one big thing.)

Throughout the years I've given up many different things: social media, my phone, milk (if you know me, you know I absolutely LOVE milk), junk food and fast food. I've done it all.

But this year, I wanted to do something different. I didn't just want to give up something that I loved. I wanted to step out of my comfort zone and do something completely out of the ordinary for me.

So, for Lent, I decided to be kind. That's right, for 40 days I'm going out of my way to be kind. I'm calling it 40 days of kindness. Everyday I pick someone or something and give a random act of kindness towards them/it.

Now, normally, I am a compassionate person. But I do just enough. I act kind when I should and only do it to a certain point. I don't normally go out of my way to act kind to people. (Which is actually very sad in my mind.)

So, I wanted to do more. I wanted to step away from my comfort zone and extend a hand to strangers (which, knowing me, I am very hesitant to do.)

And let me say, so far, it is going so very well. I feel so much happier and I have a more permanent smile on my face from these things that I'm doing.

Let me give you some examples:

This past Thursday, I had a lot laundry to do. So, I naturally took all my stuff to the laundry room and did my laundry. I hadn't decided on my act of kindness yet that day, but in the laundry room, I had an idea. I stayed in the laundry room and whenever a dryer would go off, I would take that student's clothes out of the dryer and fold them and place a short, sweet note on the top wishing them a great day.

A girl came in while I was doing this and asked me why I was folding all of her clothes. I quickly explained to her that I just wanted to do something nice for someone else. She had frowned and asked why I would take time out of my day to do such a thing. I then told her about my 40 days of kindness and when I was finished she began crying. She told me that she had just been having a rough week and didn't know what to do about it anymore. My folding of her clothes had just made her day/week and that she was so happy that there were still people in the world who took time to take care of others. She then gave me a long hug (which caused my to tear up) and took her clothes and left.

Another example was yesterday at work. I work as a media assistant in an elementary school and am taken care of by all the teachers there. So I thought it was time to give back. So, I went to the teacher work room with a couple dozen flowers and little note cards that thanked them and told them how fabulous they really are. I left the notes anonymously, but I heard teachers all throughout the day proclaiming how touched they were by the flowers and how thoughtful it was. It made me smile knowing that I could bring a smile to these women's faces.

And then this morning I went and bought my roommate breakfast and coffee because I knew she had been sick and just had a rough week in general. She didn't jump up and down or hug me but just murmured a soft thank you and ate her biscuit and drank her coffee. But even that short thanks made me smile because I knew she appreciated it and was surprised.

You see, I'm not doing this for the praise or for the thanks I get when I do these things. I do this because I feel like I am striving to be like Christ. I am not judging others based on appearance or actions; I am just doing it out of love for others.

1 John 4:19 says, "We love because He first loved us."

That is why I do this. God loved my first, so that enables me to love others.

And then Mark 12:31 says, "The second is this: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' There is no commandment greater than these."

Love your neighbor as yourself. Those words resonate deep within me. I am here on this earth to serve others and to spread the word of my God. While some people may not accept or appreciate the words of my Savior, I know they appreciate a random act of kindness. Loving my neighbors is a way in which I am honoring God.

Christ loved everyone. Not just the perfect Christians...not just the priests...not just His disciples. He loved the outcasts. He loved the ones everyone loved to hate. As a follower and daughter of the one true living God, I want to be like that. I want to become more like Jesus everyday.

This is what the 40 days of kindness is doing to me. It is changing me...shaping me into the person that I want to be and the person that God has called me to be.

So what is God calling you to do? Who is He calling you to be?

Good luck to everyone in this Lent season and don't forget to focus on our Father and His love for us.

In His love.

Content

"Love is a strange thing. Love is a phenomenon of the human experience that even science cannot begin to explain. The idea that two people who are meant to be together will actually find each other among the 7+ billion people in the world is absurd. But love is love when you find the person with whom you're "meant to be". There is a lot of truth behind the cliche "meant to be". God has someone picked out for you, me, her, him, your best friend, and Drake. The hardest part isn't finding the person. The hardest part is being patient because God already has found the person. Actually, God has already created the person. We get so impatient sometimes, as the thirst consumes us, but our future better halves are in the same struggle we are because they're waiting too. So when it comes to relationships, this is what I've learned to be true: where you're headed is way more important than how fast you arrive. Direction triumphs over speed every time. God's got your back. He knows where you're going, what job you'll have, and what godly person He has waiting for you. And when God's ready, He'll show ya. 

Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 


God has your plan already laid out. All you have to do is follow God, and He will lead you where you are meant to go."

-Blake Phillips-

Let's be honest. I'm a person who likes to live out her days planned step by step. I like to know what's going on and what's going to happen. I don't necessarily like anything unplanned and I shudder at the thought of unexpected events happening throughout my day. I have a schedule of goals for the day and I like to stick to it. Nothing is out of place.

But, not all my days work out like I want them to. My entire schedule falls apart and I'm struggling like crazy to put it back together. It's those days that I believe in God's sense of humor. As He places an unexpected moment in my day, He wants to see how I handle it. He wants to see if my patience can withhold His surprises.

When God wants me to be patient, He provides me things that DEMAND patience. 

So, obviously, when it comes to my romantic life, God really wants me to be patient. I mean, he really wants me to be patient. 

What is patience anyway? 

Patience is the ability to endure. It is the capacity to be wronged and NOT RETALIATE.

So, I bet you're wondering why I'm talking about patience and my nonexistent romantic life. You see, in college, I feel that society expects us to find that significant other. You know what I'm talking about. Society wants us to find the one who is "meant to be" with us. While some of us may have found that already, there are still a lot of us who struggle with the idea of a soulmate to do life with. 

Take me, for example. I've told you in posts before that I have been single for quite some time now. I've been out on dates. I've had and still have crazy crushes. I've had short relationships with a few guys (nothing that lasted longer than a few months). I've never had my first real kiss. 

There are days that I struggle with being single. I long for someone to live my life with. I want that connection. I want someone I can give my heart to and have him give his to me. That want will never go away. I already know this. But, that doesn't mean I have to live my life with bitter resentment as others find their significant other. 

I know that God has someone out there waiting for me. (Or maybe, He doesn't. Maybe, He wants me to serve Him in my singleness. I won't know until it happens.)

This is where patience and contentment comes in to play. We must learn to be patient and content with where we are in life at this moment and God's glory will be revealed to us. Take a look at chapter four of the book of Philippians. This is such a great passage on focusing on contentment in your life.

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 4:6-7)

Pray. Do not be anxious. The two verse above tell us all we need to know about contentment. God has got a handle on this. He has that perfect person for you in mind. In fact, this perfect person is already created by Him. Your soulmate is already walking the Earth, waiting to meet you (or maybe they already have, you just don't know it yet).

Contentment in our lives just goes back to trusting in God's ultimate plan. His way is perfect and we must put our faith and trust in that. We have the unwavering, unconditional love of God to sustain us for the rest of our days. How can we question that? That's just it; we can't. 

I found this quote the other day that put everything I think about my single life into perspective:

"Sometimes, it takes learning how to be perfectly lonely, just so God can show you what being PERFECTLY LOVED feels like."

This is so true to our lives. God never stops loving us. His love is perfect. We just need to take a step back in order to see that. 

So, whether you are in a loving relationship, married or are living out your days still looking for Mr. or Mrs. Right, remember to be content in your lives. God has a perfect plan for each and every one of us. He has the perfect person picked out for us and will be there for us when we meet him/her. 

My friend, Blake, shaped this idea in a great way. God, in a way, is our wingman. No matter the circumstances, God is always on our side and has our backs in the highs and lows. 

Before signing off on this post, let me leave you with one more verse. This one is found in chapter 8 of the book of Romans and I feel that it perfectly sums up this post:

"And we know that in all things, God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose." (Romans 8:28)

In His Love.

Faithful

In my life, I have had a lot of challenges growing up at a devout Christian. People were always ready to tear me down; ready to berate me for my beliefs. Those people were part of the causes that led to my depression and rebelliousness against the Christian beliefs while I was in high school. I had never realized how much opposition there was towards the Christian faith until then.

Since then, I've grown much stronger in my faith. That's not to say that I don't have struggles anymore. Cause I do. I still encounter people who want to challenge my beliefs and who want to tear me down till I'm nothing but dust.

What I want to talk about, today, however, is how I've been able to keep my faith in Christ as strong as it is and what it's like being one of Christ's disciples. Let me tell you, though, it isn't easy. It takes a lot of dedication and willpower.

College is a completely new adventure. We, as students, must learn new time-management skills, face new challenges, make brand new friends (all the while trying to keep up with the old ones), and make good grades. Those things are all very important and necessary in a college career. (It personally took me a lot of time and a couple of mistakes to realize that those things, while important, are not the biggest priority.

I had to learn how to stand up for what I believe it...even when that meant I was standing alone. Now, I am not ashamed of the gospel or for what I believe in, but in a society where being "cool" and "wild" is in style, keeping the faith in college can be a real mudslide of fear and intimidation.

So, let me share some things to help you (and me!) keep up our faith in college and beyond.

Journaling

"Show me Your ways, O Lord; Teach me Your paths. Lead me in Your truth and teach me, For You are the God of my salvation; On You I wait all the day." (Psalms 25:4-5)

Second semester of my freshman year, I found that keeping a journal helped me keep a firm stance in my beliefs. It keeps me in touch with my emotions and helps me remain in touch with God at all times.

When journaling, it doesn't matter what you write in, whether it be a fancy, moleskin notebook, a spiral notebook, or a notes app on your phone. Just make it an easily accessible way to write down your thoughts at any time in any place. (I also use my blog as a way to keep in touch with everything. You can use this idea or even make a private blog that only you can read!)

Now, I always find myself reaching for my journal when something is weighing on my mind. When I am able to write this burden onto paper, I feel that it has been partially released from me and my shoulders begin to feel lighter. It doesn't act permanently, but it allows me to focus on other things, such as homework or work, rather than letting it control my thoughts, ultimately distracting me from anything else that is of importance.

When we write, we are usually more engaged and more focused on whatever it is we are doing. We tend to be able to finish our thoughts when writing rather that leaving it mid thought. This is also just a time set apart for God and for God only. None of it has to be formal or fancy or eloquent. It just needs to capture what's on your heart at that moment in time.

(It's also pretty cool to look back at past journals and see how God was working in and through your heart and life!)

"Jesus Time"

"Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him and he with me." (Revelation 3:20)

As college students, we have very busy lives. Our days are filled with sports, classes, homework, meals, clubs, intramurals, etc. In the midst of this chaos, it can be hard to find time to spend with Christ. I mean, do you set apart time for praying, reading, praising, or in fellowship with others during the day, night, the weekend, weekday or everyday?

Being in a relationship with Christ takes time and effort. He is always available for us to come talk to Him, but as humans, we are agents of free will and it is up to us to accept or decline that invitation on a daily basis.

Here are some examples of ways to set apart your own "Jesus Time":

• Start a bible study with a group of friends
• When working out, instead of listening to music, listen to church sermons.
• Set apart a set time that is dedicated only to reading your Bible and spending time in prayer. 
• Find time to meet with (or Skype) with friends to talk about God and other things going on in your heart. 
• Create a Pinterest board that is dedicated to Bible verses and other Christian thoughts for those days when you just need a faith boost.

Devotionals

"So then, faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God." (Romans 10:17)

The amount of devotionals I have done in the past year is crazy. I have found so many different ones that relate to so many different topics that help me in my faith. In fact, I'm working on three different ones right now. There's a daily one that I sit down at night and complete (it takes me about 5-10 minutes); a weekly one right now called "The Disciple--A Journey with God" that I do every Tuesday night (it can take anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour); and then a monthly one called "Seven" (I read a little bit from this one every other day or so). And after I finish those, I have another one ready to go called "If Jesus Were a Sophomore--Discipleship for College Students". 

Devotionals are a great way to keep your faith strong. Once you find a devotional you want to work through, take about thirty minutes a day to sit down with your bible and that book and focus on what it's telling you. Some devotionals may by daily, some may be weekly, some monthly. It doesn't matter what it is, as long as you take time to sit down and really meditate on His Word. 

Keeping the faith in college is definitely a challenge. You have to leap through many different obstacles in order to stay strong. You also must be willing to stand up for your beliefs even when nobody is willing to stand up with you. To keep your faith, you must maintain good habits and sustain yourself in His presence and His words. 

At the end of the day, your heart will remain in His peace.

In His Love.

Student

So, tonight, I really want to talk about devotionals and what they mean in our lives, as Christians.

As Christians, we are called to constant study of the Word. God wants us to know His story and wants us to apply it to our story. These studies are more commonly known as our devotionals. They can also be seen as Bible Studies (usually found in churches). Devotionals are more for your personal time with the Creator.

Devotions are meant for daily use. They are not to be read and finished in one sitting. The point of them is to read a little bit each day and to focus on one verse or one story specifically.

Many people complete their daily devotions in different ways. Some sit in complete silence; some like to have praise in the background, etc. Since, I want to help you guys understand the importance of these devotions, I'll tell you about my daily time with God.

1. I usually start off with a dance party for one. I have a playlist with loud, crazy Christian music and I will dance around my room, singing along to each and every song. Granted, it may be off-key and I may be an awkward dancer, but God is the only one watching, so I give it my all.

2. I, then, make myself a cup of something warm (whether it be tea, coffee or hot chocolate, depending on my mood). I always feel more focused with a cup of something to calm my nerves. (Especially after that crazy dance party.)

3. I switch playlists to a more calming praise station. It still blares out my speakers, but it's more controlled. Thus, it helps me focus more.

4. I start with my 1000 Things to be Thankful for list. I talked about it in an earlier post (which you can read here).

5. Then, I find whichever bible study I'm working on at the moment and work on a chapter. Right now, I am in a series called "A Journey With God". I'm on the third book in the series and it is seriously changing the way I am living my life.

6. After my bible study, I usually read a chapter or two of my Bible. I am working through the entire Bible at the moment and am in the book of Malachi, which is the last book of the Old Testament.

7. I pray. (This is one of the most important parts of my time with God. They are the moments when I can release my burdens to Him. I can tell Him of my struggles and worries. I can thank Him for my life and for the mercies He has bestowed upon me. I can ask Him for those things that I need to ask for. It is so important to me that I establish that connection with my Father.)

8. I do a study called "5 Songs A Day" given to me by my best friend. (This is a new step as I just started it this weekend. )

      One of my really good friends here at school (his name is Thomas) sent me these little song of the day devotionals last year. I remember looking at them and skimming over them, but really didn't think of actually studying them. Well, I found them when cleaning out my computer this weekend and decided to open up the first one when I was doing my devotional yesterday.
      That devotional floored me. I had no idea my best friend was this good at writing out devotionals.
      So you understand a bit more, Thomas took five songs--five different, praise songs---added a link to the lyrics and then wrote about them. He asks you to listen to the song and to read the lyrics while doing so. (Personally, I listen to the song twice. Once to just listen and then again while looking at the lyrics.) Then, he writes a paragraph or two talking about what the song means (sometimes in his life) and what we should do with it.
      I haven't told him yet, but already, each of these little studies have brought me to my knees in tears. And it's only Day 2. I'm getting chills and tears just thinking about the study I did tonight. This guy...I had no idea how much he would bless my life. Thank you for being you, Thomas. You mean the world to me and I know how pleased God is with you right now.

9. Most of the time, I wind down with another dance party. Other times, with a cookie and milk. Haha.

But, that's just my devotion time line. Yours will be completely different. It takes time to find your groove, but it'll happen. Trust me. It took me almost 18 years to find a groove that was just me.

If you have any questions about doing a personal devotional or if you want to get together with me to do a group study, feel free to hit me up. Or if you just have questions in general about me, my blog, my story, my faith, anything, don't be scared to email me, text me, Facebook me, Skype me, whatever. I'd love to hear from you guys.

Before I sign off on this post, I'm going to leave you with the Quote of the Day from Thomas's study yesterday. I really liked it and just thought it was too important not to share.

“If there ever were a test of our faith- if there ever were a test of the motives of our worship- it is when a storm rolls into our lives. Sometimes God calms our storms. Sometimes He chooses to ride them with us.” – Casting Crowns

In explanation of their hit song “Praise You In This Storm,” Casting Crowns made this statement. Basically, the storms of our life is the biggest tests of faith that we will face. Whether it is the death of a love one, break-up, losing a job, etc, these storms are aimed by Satan to destroy us and turn us away from God by saying “where is your God in this time of trial. He has abandoned you.” Casting Crowns counters that argument by saying God is always present. In certain instances, He calms the storm immediately so we do not suffer much. But there are times when He doesn’t because He wants it to strengthen us. In this case, He is still by our side and gives us strength to weather the storm.

In His love,

Kaitlyn

Guardian

I know I post a lot about dating and boys and I would apologize for it, but I'm not going to. I feel that in my life and a lot of other girls' lives, boys are a main cause of heartache and drama. And that should so not be the case. 

I'm going to start this post by talking a little bit about myself. 

I'm 19 years old. I'm a sophomore in college. I'm single. I've never had a serious boyfriend. I've never even been kissed. 

Trust me, I've had my fair share of crushes and dates. I have. I just haven't found someone I would like to have a serious relationship with and whoever that will be hasn't found me either. 

Ever since I was old enough to understand boyfriend/girlfriend relationships, I've had a longing in my heart for something like that. I long for someone I can lean on, someone to tell my fears and wishes to, someone to love. And my longing for that isn't wrong. It isn't sinful in any aspect. I've talked about it before, and I will say it again: it is natural for us, as humans, to long for a relationship such as that. We aren't perfect; we want things. God knows this. And it is okay.

(However, this type of longing is different--very different--from a longing such as lust.)

What I really wanted to focus on, though, is the Bible verse, Proverbs 4:23: 

"Above all else, guard your hearts, for everything you do flows from it."

I spent my entire teenage years (from middle school to now) pouring myself into devotionals and self-help books for dating, sex, single-life, etc. They all taught young girls how to be safe when dating, about purity, about kissing, about courting over dating, about abstinence,  about flirting, about everything and anything that had to do with relationships with the opposite sex.

I have always had trouble when it comes to boys that I like. I give too much of myself way too quickly. This mostly is an affect from my longing of a relationship. I have a hard time holding myself back and I definitely have a very hard time being a challenge to get. 

I used to blame all the guys for them not wanting to date me or for me not wanting to date them. Everything was put on them when, in reality, everything should be put on me. It wasn't always the guy's fault that he wasn't right for me. I'm too trusting. I give pieces of my heart out to everybody without a second thought to what could possibly happen. 

Because of this, I end up getting hurt a lot. People take my heart, crumble it up and throw it right back at me. You would think I would learn from it all, right? Well, I haven't. Not yet anyway.

So what does it really mean to "guard your heart"?

I found this article that gave a great description on guarding your heart. I'll let you read part of it:

Examine his intentions and yours — communicate clearly

It’s been said that in every relationship involving a single man and woman there comes a moment when one or both individuals raise the question, “Could we be more than friends?”

How you handle this question may determine if you can even survive as friends. If you’re developing feelings for one of your male friends, begin to look for clues about how he feels for you. Does he treat you differently than other women? Does he talk to you about his interest in other women? What is his history with women? Does he tend to ask women out on dates or is he more shy and reserved? Also, ask a trustworthy friend about her thoughts. Then, pray. At some point you may want to confess your feelings for him, but don’t place your entire heart before him. You may want to suggest your feelings in a guarded way such as, “Sometimes when I’m with you, I can’t help but feel attracted to you, but I really appreciate our friendship and wouldn’t want to jeopardize that. What do you think?” Place the ball in his court.

On the flip side, if you sense he is the one having feelings, be intentional about guarding his heart if you’re not interested in him. Don’t string him along. While the attention, adoration, and compliments are enjoyable, you’re not being fair to him. You may want to try the “clue in” method. Talk about how much his friendship means to you. Talk to him about other men you’re interested in. Don’t make yourself readily available 24/7. You may need to make emotional distance, by scheduling fewer activities or spending less time with him overall.

Set limitations

It’s great to get to know someone new, but avoid making the person the center of your life. You have no idea whether this person is in your life for a short season or the long haul, so know your boundaries. You may want to set limitations on the amount of time and activities you do together. These don’t have to be spoken; they can simply be a conscious decision on your part.

If there isn’t a romantic interest on his part, you may want to consider avoiding too many one-on-one activities. Try to avoid romantic situations that will tug on your heartstrings even more. Watching sunsets over the mountains, staring at the stars under a blanket at night or viewing a movie when all his roommates are gone may feel good at the time, but they may not be the best activities for your heart. Only you can determine what you can handle, but use wisdom! Proverbs 4:6 says, “Do not forsake wisdom, and she will protect you; love her, and she will watch over you.”

Remember to guard your mind

Don’t let your mind run free and play the big “what if” game. Don’t begin rearranging your life around a feeling or hunch. Don’t plan the wedding and honeymoon before he’s even asked you on the second date. Keep your thought life balanced. If you find yourself thinking about him too much, turn the thoughts into prayers. Pray for him, and continue to seek God’s best for both of you. Don’t let your heart or mind go much further than his.

Honor your future spouse when weighing actions and behavior

This applies to the physical and emotional realm. When considering how far you should go with a person of the opposite sex emotionally or physically, keep your future spouse in mind. What would dishonor him? What do you want to reserve just for him? In your body, soul and being? This will help you draw lines early and avoid compromise. I Timothy 4: 12 says, “Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.”

Remember that your life choices are creating a living testimony. Live a story that you can tell your children without having to edit. You may want to ask a friend to hold you accountable to your actions and decisions.

Be wary of unhealthy relationships

Women often have deep compassion and caring wells. They have an innate ability to nurture others and a desire not just to be loved, but to love. I often fall into the trap of helping the bird with the broken wing. Most of us have experienced it. A bird flies into your glass window and is knocked unconscious. You find it still breathing and take it in your home. You prepare an old cardboard box with rags and linens. You keep it safe and warm and try to feed it until it is well. When you release it back into the wild, seeing it fly away brings joy and pain. Joy, because you’ve accomplished your mission. Pain, because your heart has become involved. Recognize that everyone who comes into your life isn’t your responsibility to help or nurture.

Take some time to reflect on the men that attract you. Are there any unhealthy patterns? Do you fall for controlling, manipulating or unmotivated men? Have you been involved in emotionally or physically abusive relationships? If so, it’s time to break the cycle and begin guarding your heart. Make a conscious decision to pursue healthy relationships.

Look for love in all the right places

Ephesians 3:17-18 says, “And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ and to know this love that surpasses knowledge — that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.” Your true value and identity are found only in God.

(From "A Single Woman's Guide to Guarding Her Heart")

Reading that helped me in focusing on God and God's will for me. I am more willing than ever to guard my heart. 

I mean, perhaps the best way to guard our hearts is to abandon them to Jesus. 

Just remember, God has a bigger and better plan for you than you can ever imagine. So let Him be the one to lead you.

In His love,

Kaitlyn

Thankful

So, it's my first Friday night back at school and I'm sitting in my room by myself. Down the road, there's a back-to-school dance going on; there's a huge volleyball match right outside my window; people were baking cookies earlier in the kitchen. There's a lot of stuff going on tonight, but I decided to stay in. Part of the reason is because I have an awful headache and a fever, so I don't feel so well. And the other part is because I wanted to spend time in the Word. I haven't done that a lot recently, and I felt like tonight was a perfect night to do so.

So here I am. With my mug full of hot tea, my Bible opened, my praise music on, and my new devotional already covered in my handwriting.

I started my time with my Father by opening my journal and working on my Thankful List.

Now, many of you may be wondering what a Thankful List is and I'm happy to explain.

About a year ago, one of my very best friends told me about this list she had been keeping where she wrote down everything she is thankful for. Obviously, I was intrigued. She told me that whenever something that she took for granted or just was happy about, she would write it on the list. The challenge was to find 1000 things to be thankful for. Yes, you can repeat things. (You're allowed to be thankful for something more than once in your life.)

So, the next day, I found a journal that I was going to discard because I honestly didn't want to look at it anymore. (Note: I'm about to go into a side-tracked story for you to understand why I wanted to get rid of the journal.) 

On the front of it was the logo for Winshape, the Christian program at my school. You have to apply to be in this program and I did so. I even got as far as the interview process. I got to spend two days at this wonderful place where college students spent their days with each other praising God and having fun. 

To put it plainly, I fell in love with Winshape and the people there. I wanted to be a part of it. I wanted it like nothing I've ever wanted before.

After the interview process, they told us that we would be contacted in a few months for whether we got in or not. I anxiously waited for that letter. I checked the mail obsessively for weeks. I got a care package from them which contained a sticker for my car and this journal, among other little things. I was so optimistic that I went ahead and put the sticker on my car's back windshield.

Then the letter came. It was too thin. I knew without even opening it that I hadn't made it. I could barely even open it because I was shaking so badly. Once I finally opened it and read those heartbreaking few sentences, I broke down. I cried and cried and cried. I felt betrayed by God. I thought He had wanted me there. I thought that He pushed me that far because He wanted me to be a part of Winshape. 

That rejection hurt. A lot. I didn't want to look at anything to do with Winshape for a few weeks. It hurt to tell those friends I made while at the interview process that I didn't make it. I couldn't talk to any of them without breaking down and crying.

I threw away the letters from Winshape, and most of the stuff they had sent me save for a devotional, that car sticker and the journal.

It wasn't until that day that I found the journal, that I realized how thankful I was for the opportunity to interview with Winshape. Not many people get that far and I did. Obviously, God didn't want me there at that time, and I realized last year, that Winshape wasn't meant for me at all. God has bigger and better plans for me and my life, so I put my trust in Him that He knows what they are.

But anyway, after realizing that, I opened this journal and started my 1000 Things to be Thankful For list. And let me say, it's something that I treasure. I will admit that it's hard sometimes. It's been a year and I'm only halfway through the list. Somedays, I feel like I don't have something to be thankful for. But I try to write at least one thing per day no matter what.

And the cool thing is that this list can include everything from serious things to downright silly things. For example (as you can see from my pictures), I wrote down things from Subway to life in general, from my roommate to One Direction, from my faith to bubble baths. We have so so much to give thanks to.

I wrote about 15 things tonight and I'll probably write more after this post. But, my devotional tonight actually dealt with being thankful. I read so many verses about thankfulness and I am so happy that I live in a world under a God who has given me so much to be thankful for.

Take a look at these 20 verses on thankfulness:

1 Thessalonians 5:18

Psalm 107:1

Ephesians 5:20

Colossians 3:15-17

James 1:17

Philippians 4:6

2 Corinthians 9:15

Psalm 106:1

Psalm 105:1

Colossians 4:2

Psalm 118:1-18

Psalm 20:4

Psalm 30:12

Colossians 3:17

Romans 1:21

Psalm 100:4

Isaiah 12:4-5

1 Chronicles 29:13

Philemon 1:4

That is twenty (TWENTY) verse about being thankful. And I'm sure there are many many more. The ability to be thankful and to express thanks to our Lord is pretty cool and I want to be able to remember to do it every day. I want to wake up each morning and tell God thanks for just giving me another day to live. I want to go to bed every night and tell Him thanks for everything that happened that day. And I plan on doing both those things everyday now.

Trust me, every one of you reading this is on my Thankful List. I love you guys immensely and I thank you for letting me vent or just express my feelings or thoughts towards you guys. Y'all really are great.

Be thankful for what and who you have in your life. Don't take anything for granted. And live a full life.

In His love,

Kaitlyn

Social Creature

(I told you guys I was planning on posting a lot more.)

For the past few days, I've had something weighing on my heart. I didn't notice it at first, but as time kept moving on, I felt this struggle get heavier and heavier. This morning, it felt as if it was going to burst.

But, that's what this blog is here for, right? To get things off my chest? To talk about what God is telling me?

[THIS IS A WARNING: This post may be a little longer than normal. This is because of what I have to say about this topic. I have a lot on my heart, and I just want to get it all out.]

So, let's talk about communication, shall we?

Communication is a major part of society at this point in time. We are social creatures. We want to talk to people and we want to connect with them. Because of this, we now have sites such as Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Vine, etc. These sites help us keep in contact with people we don't live near or don't get to see as much. Social media is huge in our society.

But I don't want to talk about social media in this post. I'll save it for later. Instead, I want to talk about the different ways of communication we experience and what should and what shouldn't be done during those times of communication.

We all have different people we communicate with: boyfriends, girlfriends, parents, siblings, friends, enemies, etc. Communication is a key part of any relationship. No matter who you are, you must communicate with others in order to get somewhere in life. I want to talk for a bit about the different people we communicate with in our daily lives.

BOYFRIENDS/GIRLFRIENDS/CRUSHES:

Even if you are single, I'm sure you have talked to someone of the opposite sex--someone you have a crush on. It's definitely hard to do sometimes. I know that I get flustered and awkward when it comes to talking someone that I really like. I will start to laugh a lot and will get red in the face. When I talk to my crush whether it be through text, over the phone, over Skype, on Facebook, etc. I get butterflies in my stomach and I can never keep the smile off my face.

I think it is adorable and great if you get butterflies still when talking to your boyfriend/girlfriend. It means you still like them and are excited to talk to them. And even if you don't get butterflies, it means you're comfortable talking to them and feel comfortable around them.

That's very important in relationships such as those. The ability to feel comfortable while speaking to your boyfriend/girlfriend is a good sign. You should never feel uncomfortable or awkward when talking to them.

I will admit, I'm single. I don't have a boyfriend and have never really had a serious one in the past. However,  I've been able to watch my friends' relationships and have been able to determine what is good and what isn't when it comes to communication.

You have to have trust, openness and faith in a loving relationship. You have to be able to speak to one another about insecurities, fears, praises, troubles, etc. You can't hide behind secrets. You should be able to share your thoughts with your boyfriend/girlfriend/crush without the fear of being judged. If that person really cares for you, then they won't run away and they will support you no matter what.

Through the many crushes I've had, I've had trouble with it. I want to hide my past from others sometimes. I don't them to know that I've been down a dark path and I don't want them to judge me based on the scars on my body.

However, I've recently discovered that being open at the beginning of any relationship I'm a part of, my openness and willingness to share really makes a difference in how I connect with the other person. Whoever my future boyfriend or husband is, I want them to know straight off the bat that I've had struggles in the past and that it was a journey to overcome them.

Just remember that it's better to start off a relationship with honesty and clarity rather than lies and deceit.

FRIENDS/ENEMIES:

We all know what the Bible says about enemies: love them as you love yourself. Don't speak harsh words and kill them with kindness (as my mother always tells me).

We know what it says about friends too. We are supposed to lift each other up in Christ and to love and forgive one another. "For all fall short of the glory of God." (Romans 3:23)

Friends are a great way to vent and ask for advice. I actually spent most of the morning with one of my best friends talking about the guys in my life and asking for her advice on everything. She was so supportive and gave me some of the best advice.

I always enjoy talking to my friends. We listen to each other and lift each other up when we're feeling down. They support me and love me for who I am. With my friends, no holds are barred. We are open and honest with each other about everything. That's why I love those friendships. They mean the world to me and I wouldn't want to change them for the world.

GOD:

I could say so much about communication with God. For me, it's the most important part of each day. I wake up thanking Him and go to bed praising Him. Constant communication with God provides us with clarity and relaxation. Instead of talking too much about communication with God, I will redirect you to THIS POST that I found that explains it better than I ever will.

Prayer is important in a Christian life and while it's not the only way to communicate with God, it is one of the main ones.


I feel that communication will always be a big part of our lives. We have to communicate to connect with people and to get somewhere in life. It's a part of our everyday schedule.

You see, I've just had some struggle with communication recently.

 With my friends, it's been hard explaining my feelings and trying to get my opinion across without it sounding pretentious.

And with guys, I'm having a hard time getting my feelings across to them in general. I really want to outright say things that are on my heart, but I'm scared that it would scare them away and I don't want that. It's a struggle finding the balance of the right time to talk about certain things.

However, I'm working on it all and I hope to get better at communicating with the people around me. I also plan to work on my communication with God in prayer and devotionals. I want to be more Christlike and I feel that I should always be in communication with Him in order to do that.

But anyways, that's all I wanted to talk about today. My heart feels much lighter and I'm thankful to be able to express my feelings on this blog. In closing, here are verses that talk about communication as a Christian and what it should look like:

Love one another -John 13:34 & John 15:12,17.

Forgive one another -Ephesians 4:32 & Colossians 3:13.
 
Be servants to one another -Galatians 5:13.

Show hospitality to one another -1 Peter 4:7-10.

Pray for one another -James 5:16.

Build up (edify) one another -Romans 14:19,1 Thessalonians 5:11.

Greet one another -Romans 16:16,1 Peter 5:14.

Forbear one another -Ephesians. 4:1-2 & Colossians 3:13-14.

Do not judge one another -Romans 14:13.

Do not speak evil of one another -James 4:11.

Do not murmur against one another -James 5:9.

Do not bite and devour one another -Galatians 5:15.

Do not provoke and envy one another -Galatians 5:26.

Have the same care for one another -1 Corinthians 12:25-26.

Receive one another -Romans 15:7.

Teach one another -Colossians 3:16.

Admonish (counsel) one another -Romans 15:14 & Colossians 3:16.

Submit to one another -Ephesians 5:21-22.

Confess your sins to one another -James 5:16.

Do not lie to one another -Colossians 3:9.

Be kind to one another -Ephesians 4:32.

Comfort one another -1 Thessalonians 4:18, 5:11.



In His love,

Kaitlyn